helpless turtle

When your girl decides to be dominant as fuck and she sits on you while you're on your back so you can't get up

Bro I got fucking helpless turtled last night

by Luxemo January 5, 2018

Turtle

The most badass thing in the whole entire planet

Damn! Did you hear that a turtle beat Chuck Norris

by 1234567898754321 June 6, 2018

Turtle-Tonguing

Eating that cooch shamefully, similar to how a turtle pokes its head out

Being bad at given a female oral

“How was last night, did he go down on you?”

“Well… something like that, he ended up turtle-tonguing me, it was painfully slow and anticlimactic”

by Cowhide19 August 12, 2025

Pyjama Turtle

Someone who uses protection after they already have protection because they are a paranoid pillock.

"So did you do it?"
"Yeah but he had 3 condoms on, such a pyjama turtle"

"Maybe i should bring extra, just in case"
"Dude don't be a pyjama turtle"

by Pyjama Turtle November 18, 2011

hunting turtle

A robot monster with four legs and a shell and it looks like a turtle but it's not... I learned

Dude I found a strange turtle

That's a hunting turtle... Run

by liner April 5, 2015

Bathtub turtle

When your stomach and penis float to the surface of the water in the tub, resembling a sea turtle popping its head up.

I have to remember to knock next time before I see another bathtub turtle.

by Kurtjohnson February 24, 2024

turtle

fat shithead

me: fatfucker turtle ate my cherios today
person: ok

by KiwiTheTabbyz October 4, 2021