Mind Wank

A telepathic wank using your mind. BUT YOU AINT THINKING ABOUT THE HOMIES

luke was thinking of Sam's toes so much that he needed to have a mind wank. But he is a homie...

by ProfessorMindWank November 17, 2020

a nigel danger wank

Nigel was in his bedroom and he shouted downstairs, Mum(deceased and rotten) call the fucking police there's a madman with a set of steak knives hacking me to pieces. As soon as nigel heard her scream he dropped his trousers and commenced the danger wank. As nigel heard mummy stomp up the stairs nigel knew he had to be quick so he upped the pace, as nigel heard her stumble on the top step, which bought him some time. Unfortunately nigel timed his finish badly. As nigels mum barged through the door armed with a rolling pin nigel chugged all over mummy. nigel spent the evening in A&E with concusion.

a nigel danger wank job

by mrs tosser October 6, 2025

Greebly-Wank

When die-hard fans of a film or franchise create elaborate backstories for things that ultimately had no real purpose, such as greeblys used in production design elements

Look at that absolute nerd, he created a whole Greebly-wank Wiki page on Darth Maul's earring

by Toodarnloud February 8, 2024

whizz wank

Where you wank at an extremely fast speed

'im just off for a whizz wank, im done :D'

by ninjaabill December 21, 2009

mojo wank

having a wank pre-booty call to up your stamina for the main round.

mate 1: what are you doing?

mate 2: having a mojo wank before fanny comes over

by diddly dingbat October 21, 2015

wanking for a spanking

1. It's a very sad and sorry situation, scenario and practice by some realty sick boys. Ninny boys who are into S & M are jacking off while reading those 'mash notes' from their dominator bitches and get turned on while thinking about the 'discipline' they'll get next time they meet their favorite whore, they are wanking while thinking about the spankings they are gonna get.

2. When somebody is being a glutton for punishment. Kind of like 'cruising for a bruising'. ASKING for trouble.

1. Donald Treason tRump has shown the world in so many ways what an SMF he is. He talks incestuous lust about his daughter and there are pictures of the two together that would make a dog upchuck. He rapes, and has been convicted of it. He talks pervert trash ('the younger, the better'). He brags about 'grabbing em by the pussy'. He is an egotistical Caligula by every definition and description of that grossly deviant Roman emperor. And the stripper whore Stormy Daniels spilled the beans on '60 Minutes' about swatting his ass. il Douche Donald is a spankee boy. Shiiiiiiii-yiiiiiiiiitttttt, he's wanking for a spanking! DAMN!!!

2. Jeffrey is reading those stupid BDSM books and watching that Rihanna video again, he's wanking for a spanking!

3. Rikki is being a spoiled diva prima donna again. She's just wanking for a spanking to put her in her place! She's a big disgrace.

by I Saw U2 Live Twice December 22, 2023

Irish wank

Placing one's penis inside a cooked and hollowed out potato. The potato is Ireland's biggest crop, and due to a shortage of eligible women in rural locations, men have taken to placing their erect penises inside potatoes in order to release the inevitable sexual frustration arising from such a situation.

Seamus hasn't had a girlfriend in 20 years. Now he spends most evenings engaging in an Irish wank.

by IrishGypsyDan April 21, 2018