Big fat turd

What is considered to be the worst insult ever,meaning that someone is less then worthless etc.

I wish you would die and burn in hell you big fat turd!

by Judge dredd7 March 1, 2011

tickle my turds

An expression of encouragement from a passive gay partner (or possibly from a female buggeree) indicating that they are ready and willing to have their drains cleaned.

"Never mind those celebrities in the jungle, Ant, come back to bed and tickle my turds!"

by Bob Sometimes March 23, 2005

Turd Burglar

someone who stinks and has always got snoton their clothes. Example stinks

You are a turd burglar

by gaylord March 23, 2005

moist turd gas

A fresh farty fragrance. Funny because it sounds like "mustard gas".

Aaron came over to Jeff's work station and laid down some heavy moist turd gas as a payback for the nasty bean bomb that Jeff had dropped on Aaron just 30 minutes earlier.

by Gregg Loogyanus December 7, 2006

Turd Degree Burn

(N) When you are taking a particularly steamy/warm poop, and it burns your butt hole when it comes out. Stems from the phrase, "Third degree burn"

Todd: "Dude, that shit burnt coming out. It did not feel good"
Phil: "Sounds like you got a turd degree burn. You might need some cream for that."

by Dantione the great February 20, 2017

Can't polish a turd

No matter how nice someone acts or good someone dresses, it doesn't change the fact that the person is at that time seen as an asshole.

Scene from Californication: protagonist suits up for a trial when daughter walks in.
Protagonist: 'How do I look?'
Daughter: 'You know what they say...can't polish a turd.'

by AnaleTaart August 15, 2011

turd in the punch bowl

A comparative word, used to describe the unpopularity of a certain person.

Here comes Lorna. She's about as welcome as a turd in the punch bowl.

by Joao Bufamarillo May 15, 2005