functionally Amish

The condition of being clueless about technology.

She can't figure out how to open her e-mail; she's functionally Amish.

by xxoomom February 09, 2010

Amish tug

to masturbate without the aid of any pornography; no electronic devices/magazines which are not part of Amish culture

The power went out and my phone was dead so I had to Amish tug.

I pulled an Amish tug last night because I was too tired to look up porn.

by Mattj March 02, 2015

Amish Roadblock

When two cars stay parallel to each other on a two-lane highway, preventing any cars behind them from passing and getting ahead.

Jesse: How are you doing up there?
Trevor: Good! I just got passed by a little blue car after he had been flashing his lights at me for awhile, but then the two cars ahead of me Amish Roadblocked him and he couldn't get any farther ahead.

by Bobbythunder May 09, 2015

Socially Amish

When a person has no social media or a cell phone.

Sarah: Can I have your number?
Bob: Sorry, I don't have a cell phone. I'm socially Amish.
Sarah: Do you have Facebook?
Bob: No

by babyhuey121794 October 08, 2013

Socially Amish

When a person has no social media or a cell phone.

Sarah: Can I have your number?
Bob: Sorry, I don't have a cell phone. I'm socially Amish.
Sarah: Do you have Facebook?
Bob: No

by babyhuey121794 October 08, 2013

Old Amish

The act of squirting chocolate milk into your mouth, then taking a swig of milk directly from the udder of a milk cow, and shaking it back and forth to make chocolate milk in your cheeks.

"I've naught time for thine cup nor thine spoon, but Glladys, mine milking cow serves me well for making the Old Amish as dessert, once."

by Erogenous Bosch August 05, 2022

Amish Surprise

When you cum in a food container and don't tell anyone and you wait for them to eat it

I totally left an AMISH SURPRISE in that jar of mayonnaise that Mikiel is putting onto his ham and cheese sandwhich

by lovemuffin69420 May 25, 2023