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Turtle Shell

When it’s cold or not and your dick decides to back inside yourself like a turtles head goes back in it’s shell.
Gawd damn! My dick gawn back in his turtle shell! What’s wrong lil guy? Ya cold? Come on out, I’ll keep ya warm in my hand.
by Dr.EvilRaj July 27, 2018
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crack turtle

Someone who's extraordinarily slow, maybe due to an overconsumption of narcotics.
A: Man, I don't drink wine on Thursdays.
B: It's Friday, you crack turtle.
by thepranxter July 31, 2018
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Wash my turtle

Wash my turtle is used by someone ironically saying that he has a lot of important things to do.
I can't go out today.I have to wash my turtle.
by Fotindigo January 25, 2019
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eat a turtle

literally just eating a turtle because you're not a vegan or vegetarian, or not normal.
by danielbuddlikestoyeehaw September 27, 2018
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Ninja turtled

When a person get siblings to fight someone
Guy 1: yo josh got jumped yesterday
Guy 2: yeah heard he got ninja turtled
by Generally-Sheev September 27, 2018
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Turtle

A Turtle is someone that is usually very clumsy both physically and mentally. They are very vhirpy people but they knock over drinks and ashtrays a lot. When playing board ganes with a Turtle they will constantly need reminded of the rules to the point where you feel the need to spaz-moan and start slapping your face in disbelief. Turtles can also be great Ice Breakers as they can withstand constant barrages of comedic mockery from all angles due to their impenetrable shell.
Whilst playing snakes and ladders, Bobby rolled a 5 and went up a snake... Thinking he was only 3 squares from winning, Bobby was pumped.

^Bobby is an absolute Turtle"
"OMFG Dude You are such a Turtle!"
by StrudlePie June 2, 2018
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Turtle

The most badass thing in the whole entire planet
Damn! Did you hear that a turtle beat Chuck Norris
by 1234567898754321 June 6, 2018
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