Two-Toke Jamoke

A marijuana lightweight.

-I took one hit out the bong and could feel my hair start growing.
-You are a fucking Two-Toke Jamoke.

by chew_chew December 10, 2011

Beast with two vax

Having casual sex as soon as you're fully vaccinated.

As soon as I get my second shot, I'm making the beast with two vax with everyone who's down.

by kitten chops March 20, 2021

Two Venison Donuts

00 buckshot, as in 'two donuts (o's) of venison (buck)'. Used as a warning to people you don't want around, like exes. If they were expecting a meal and hospitality they'd better expect to be eating two venison donuts instead. Could also be used if someone "ate two venison donuts" to mean they took themselves out, although using it that way is pretty disrespectful.

The only thing a guest can expect to eat if they end up on Harold's property is a meal of two venison donuts.

by L. Lowr August 31, 2021

Two mothers’ chimneys

Old English saying for when something is either too difficult or too easy to do

“Is it a complicated route to get to there?”
“Oh no, it’s like two mothers’ chimneys, you can just get the underground direct.”

Or

“Gosh, that tax return process was complicated!”
“I know, I did mine last month and it was like two mothers’ chimneys”.

by Befarnajo July 9, 2023

Texas two step

When two people are approaching in opposite directions, intending to pass each other. When close, both people choose the same side to pass each other on and are forced to stop. A second step to the other side follows, and upon realizing each of their fatal flaw they exchange an embarrassing look and proceed on their way.

Dude, every time I’m trying to walk past someone we end up Texas Two Stepping

by Two Step Tutorials October 20, 2018

Timmy Two Pumps

To be associated with the word "timmy two pumps" is not the most flattering of things. Simply put, it means you can't hold your load. Even simpler put - it means you're a premature ejaculator.

Dude1: bro! Why aren't you in the other room with that girl anymore?

Dude2: Man, I took off my pants and splooged everywhere. It was over before it started. She then proceeded to call me Timmy Two Pumps.

Dude1: godamnit, dude.

by Dekrepit90 February 16, 2015

Two check sandwich

To get a layoff, or terminated, from your job, especially a contract or labor union job. Named so because you get your regular check, plus a layoff payoff check, so the company doesnt owe you anything else.

"Hey did Paul get a layoff?"
"Yeah, they gave him a two check sandwich"

by theDunson January 24, 2019