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Writer

A human-like species fueled on coffee, criticizes themselves. The mating call of writers is the sound of pages flipping.
Did you see that crazy writer?
by Redder21 January 27, 2019
mugGet the Writermug.

non-writer

A mediocre, unimaginative person who can't write their way out of a wet paper bag. The medical condition is called Dysgraphia. If you've ever worked at advertising agencies, academic institutions or content marketing teams, you'd know who these people are. Non-writers are easily identified by their linear patterns of thinking, a complete inability to vary syntax, and an endless self-struggle with using the right adjective. They may apply all the cosmetic glow to their substandard, pathetic excuse of a writing but just one glance at those run-on sentences, and you'd know these people are just not meant to write anything important or complex.

By some quirk of fate, talented professional writers end up in the same team as these non-writers. In the eyes of management, they are the same as you, and are qualified to the same rates of pay. When that happens, you have no choice but to suffer their severe incompetence and bruised egos. Despite being embarrassing failures, non-writers are not open to constructive comments and edits.

The invention of AI writing tools has come as a boon to these non-writers. At least now they can hide their dysgraphia. But the lack of freshness in writing remains a permanent question mark on their skills and capabilities.
Me: "Who wrote this blog post?"
Management: "Our new hire, Tanveer."
Me: "I'm sorry. Have you seen the adverb overload on this one? This looks like the work of a non-writer. This Tanveer or whatever should look for an alternative occupation. I can't think of a less capable person to be writing our blog posts."
Management: "Perhaps you're right. But you need to find a way to adjust around this non-writer. Why don't you just correct his mistakes, and no-one has to know! That's why we hired you anyway."
by Third World Sam March 13, 2024
mugGet the non-writermug.

"ghost writer" AUTHORity

Rampant in "chain of command" situations --- especially the military and "mega-biz" establishments --- whereby everybody wants to push underlings around but then hastily "passes the buck" and claims ignorance/innocence when things go sour. Refers to the deplorable practice of an arrogant/dictatorial/irresponsible/ignorant a**h**e with way too much power ("authority") giving unwise/ineffective/counter-productive orders to one or more hapless underlings, brusquely refusing to listen to their urgently-beseeching appeals about the fallacy/unfairness/danger of proceeding as he told them, but then suddenly shedding all knowledge/responsibility (i.e., not admitting that he was indeed the "author" of those crazy stipulations) regarding said preposterous directives whenever s**t hits the fan afterwards as a result of his subordinates' having reluctantly-but-obediently carried out his unwisely-mandated actions.
I long ago decided to not just blindly/arbitrarily follow orders/rules/laws, no matter what position or experience or education/training that their "authors" happened to supposedly possess... I **always** use my own judgement/conscience in all my actions. Too many times in the past, I've gotten in knee-deep doo-doo MYSELF for someone else's screw-ups in reasoning/planning, only to have said "idiot in power" pull da ol' "ghost writer" AUTHORity trick on me, never admitting or even falsely denying ever having told me to proceed that way, just so that HE would not have to suffer any of the fallout from his own preposterous directives.
by QuacksO August 25, 2018
mugGet the "ghost writer" AUTHORitymug.

Bed Writer

A person pissing or shitting on the bed in a letter pattern
by Rose koi June 1, 2022
mugGet the Bed Writermug.

Co-writer

Ohohohohohoho! Maybe not a charlatan! Are we starting to believe the things we say? Because I was going to go on a about how meritocracy isn't real and use myself as evidence... You know? Cause of all the blatant and public exploitation? But that might no longer be necessary! I don't have a bank account so just bring a briefcase full of money.
Hym "OHOHOHOHOHOHO!!! Oh!? Is the world-changing, genius philosopher your co-writer now!? Is that was makes your book so deep? Because it was co-written by the Mariana trench in human form? Hohohohohohoho! You're a lucky guy! To have the world's greatest mind on retainer like that. Maybe I was wrong about you!"

Iam "You forgot the 'convenient excuse' part..."

Hym "Huh? Oh! Ah shit! Yeah, Autism would be a super convenient excuse for my behavior. Untouchable! Beyond contempt! Above scrutiny! Better than everyone! Ahahahahahaha!"
by Hym Iam January 3, 2023
mugGet the Co-writermug.

Writer's rage

When you read a piece of literature so terrible that you suddenly have the extreme urge to write something better than it
Sam: hey did you go see r/menwritingwomen?
Violet: yes and it gave me severe writer's rage.
by E.V.D. January 1, 2021
mugGet the Writer's ragemug.

Wiki Page Writer

A person who has unlimited power and knowledge despite being something like a Discord mod. Also, the best part is that they share their knowledge with you for free. Rumour is, most people don't know to become a Wiki Page Writer.
I write Wiki pages as a Wiki Page Writer
mugGet the Wiki Page Writermug.

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