Jehovah's Splitness

The only real way you can deal with a JW that is a member of your family. No matter what you say you cannot convince them that they a working for an enormous tax dodge publishing empire based in NYC.

In return they have to stay away from you once you make it clear you think their beliefs are beyond whacky.

The result - you don't see each other, but you still get to go to all the fun things like birthdays etc without that freak being there. Win!

Bob: Hey, is that your brother in law? Lets go say hi.

Adam: Nah man, he's a JW, we are keeping our distance.

Bob: Sounds like some serious Jehovah's Splitness there bro?

Adam: Damn right, it's awesome.

by Witness the Fitness April 8, 2010

SplitPiss

After you dump your spunk and wait a little while your one-eyed warrior sometimes gets it's eye stuck shut and when you hang a rat you piss in two directions at once, neither of which was your primary target. Usually involves a leg or a favorite shoe. If it involves a face you are either R. Kelly or fucked up or both...

"No-o-o-o, a doberman didn't hump my leg. I went splitpissin' after yankin' my yoda to the latest edition of FHM. There's a couple of pages in there ain't nobody ever gonna yank apart..."

by Fecesboy May 31, 2004

Spitties

Sunflower seeds. So named for what you do with the shell after you injest them.

Hey buddy. Pass me that bag of spitties, will ya?

by fuckup, screwed, fucked, gawd, shit August 31, 2006

Splitizen

An individual with multiple citizenship.

Charles has a dual citizen ship. He is Bermudian, and American. He is therefore a Splitizen.

by donaldj February 22, 2010

Splitcision

Combined and abbreviated word derived from split decision. Primarily used in political or sports related discourse

Chase Alan is a splitcision quarterback, exactly what the Redskins need this year.

by Chase deez October 25, 2018

splittist

separatist, schismatic, secessionist

According to the Washington Post editorial page, the Chinese government belittles the anti-Olympics protests as "the work of Western extremists or splittists such as the Dali Lama." Source: William Safire, New York Times

by Una Malachica April 27, 2008

Splittie

A slang term used to describe a period of time. Most often, used to refer to a "split second"

John: "Hey, I just got my new tv... Want to come over and help me set it up?"

Jake: "Sure, im just around the corner, be there in a splittie."

by Justin Kelly March 23, 2009