Mazel Tug

When a Jewish girl gives you a hand job.

After the service at the synagogue she gave me service with a Mazel Tug.

by Bushwak84 October 11, 2013

Mazel Tits

1. An exclamatory phrase used in celebration of a circumstance or event.
2. The exceptional bosoms of a Jewish woman or voluptuous man.

1. Mazel Tits you got the job!
2. Hey Joey look at the Mazel Tits Natalie Portman!

by BettyFordCentre432 October 01, 2011

mazel tov

Congratulations. Often used in a jocular or sarcastic manner.

1. Becky: "It's my birthday today."
Moe: "Mazel tov."

2. Moe: "I just failed my chem paper."
Becky: "Mazel tov. Good luck getting into uni."

by Diacetylm0rphine February 13, 2010

mazel tov

What jews say when they're about to come.

Zona: Oh, Sarsur. Stick your muzion in my okhel!
Sarsur: Ah yes! I shall thrust my makolet in your darkon! Oh, wait, wait, uh MAZEL TOV!

by dirtybeandip January 08, 2012

mazel toss

The act of using a bagel stuffed with cream cheese and lox into the whole and masturbating with it and then exclaiming "Mazel Toss!!" while ejaculating. Various sexual fantasies can be fulfilled with using different types of bagels.

Simon: I thought I heard someone scream in pain and turned out it was just Saul. He was finishing a Mazel Toss when I walked in on him. Disgusting! He used the rest of my lox too.
Bernie: Nightmare! Was he using pumpernickel again? He likes 'em dark.
Simon: No, but it was a mini bagel. I think he like 'em young too.

by von groovy May 27, 2017

Mazel tossed

When a person has to a gets a little too drunk at a Jewish function, including but not limited to a Bar Mitzvah, Passover Seder, or bris.

I had four bottles of manischewitz at David's son's bris, and punched the moil for touching my nephew. I was definitely Mazel Tossed.

We did 8 shots of potato vodka and got Mazel Tossed and Ezra's Hannukah party.

Joshua likes to get Mazel Tossed and annex parts of Palestine.

Yaakov got Mazel Tossed at Noah's Shabbat Seder and threw up Matzo balls all over my Yankees Kippah.

by Doctor Dreidel September 15, 2020

mazel tov

a phrase used by jewish children in christian schools to piss off devout people.

*teacher looks at Bob* "Bob, you failed again." *Jewish kid in corner says* "Mazel Tov, Bob!!!!"

by Malekhamoves March 15, 2004