I ain't here to fuck spiders

A sarcastic term used by Australians as reply to a question with an obvious answer.

Your mum's friend: What are you doing in Woolies? Grocery shopping?
Your mum: Well, I ain't here to fuck spiders!

by lemonfresh November 27, 2016

Go fuck spiders

To be used when a person in your presence is being intensely annoying such as spouting complete nonsense and therefore serving no useful purpose existing.

Go fuck spiders! Interesting thought, which legs do you part to gain entry? Hence, how to amuse a fool.

by rjc56 July 30, 2006

Here to Fuck Spiders

Here to Fuck Spiders

Edited Australian slang. The term "Not here to Fuck Spiders" is derived from and is another way of saying, “not here to fuck around. I am here to get the job done”.” Stop wasting time we have things to do”.

So, by default, "here to Fuck Spiders" is simply to mess around, goof off, waste time, and have a blast. Or as a means of using the internet to procrastinate, pursuing frivolous websites rather than accomplishing work. Could also indicate an unnatural attraction to arachnids.

Can be used around women and children as “here to fornicate with arachnids’"

1. "Hey man, you wanna get drunk tonight?"
"Sure bro! I'm here to fuck spiders!"

or

2. "Did you finish your essay?"
"No, I started disking around. I'm not motivated right now. Just here to fuck spiders."

by soupersalad May 13, 2016

Not here to fuck spiders

A metaphor for not having sex with a skinny girl.

Generally used in a sentence to declare ones love for big booty bitches and nothing else.

1. "Look at that girl, she is thicc"
"Well I'm not here to fuck spiders"

2 " We're not fucking spiders in 2019, big booty bitches only.

by djamax January 10, 2019

Not here to fuck spiders

“Fuck Spiders” Originally refers to (during boredom) putting all finger tips together and bouncing palms in and out. Which can look like two spiders fucking.

“Are we getting the job done?”

“Yeah, we’re not here to fuck spiders”

by URBAN155 July 18, 2022

Not here to fuck spiders

Here to get shit done, not waste time.
In the language of the screen -cartoons especially- the passage of time without activity in a place is hit home with spider webs festooned all over everything. Why would you want that? Spiders everywhere? Are you into spiders?

Not here to fuck spiders, mate.

by Nick Brook May 1, 2025

Well we’re not here to fuck spiders

Australian way of saying “Well no shit”

*at the pub*
Person 1:“wanna grab a drink?”
Person 2: “well we’re not here to fuck spiders”

by I can’t think of a name June 7, 2018