Taken place on the fortnight of February 26th, 1987,
Captain Schlurnt and the men of the North Dakotan
Army stormed into South Dakota in order to combine the Dakotas into one. The South Dakotan Militia vehemently opposed such a ordeal, leading Major Blunkus of the SDM to prepare defenses in the
case of an invasion. Blunkus and his men killed at least 14 North Dakotans, essentially eradicating half the population of North Dakota in a matter of minutes. In light of this devastating loss, the Treaty of Barren Wastelands was signed the next
day, keeping North and South Dakota separate for at least the next
41 years.
Normal USA man: Who is in the
picture on your mantle?
South Dakotan: Oh, that’d be the Mighty Major Blunkus, who repelled the savage North Dakotans during the Dakota
War on the fortnight of February 26th, 1987.