Captain jack sparrow

When your wife fslls asleep on your wedding night so to punish her you splooge in her eye, making her look like a pirate.

Had to sort myself out on my wedding night, here have some jizz in your eye, love you captain jack sparrow

by Daura2731 November 20, 2018

Captain Novolin

That one retarded kid with diabetes who thinks he's a superhero. He's just fat.

bro richard is such a Captain Novolin

by Icosalord March 19, 2022

Captain Crunch

When drunk people fall down or get messed up in their drunken state.

*drunk person trips over curb and smokes face on parking meter*
Joe - "Wow, that dude just captain crunched!"

by OSO_LOCO January 21, 2021

captain stupid head

A person who is so stupid and dumb that they drag along a crew with them and the whole crew ends up being stupid, so that makes them the captain of all the stupid heads

All Aboard, your captain today will be captain stupid head

by Captain stupid head December 22, 2020

Captain Jackswallows

A derogatory term for a faggot who has taken on the persona of the infamous Captain Jack Sparrow from those gay pirate movies.

(Southerner) "Hey whats with the monkey Captain Jackswallows?"

(Typical Yankee) "Shut up prick she's my girlfriend....racist."

by SweetDee! November 23, 2011

drum captain

A guy who is usually a huge dick. One becomes drum captain because of seniority, regardless of musical skill. The band director usually lets the drum captain get away with anything. Assigns himself the best parts in songs while everybody else gets shit on and put on cymbals.

Drum Captain: Hey, I'm putting you on bells despite the fact you're a better musician than I am for this song while me and my friends are gonna play snare.

Other Percussionist: Dude, fuck you. Bells only play for 13 measures in the entire song.

Captain: But you can read music.

Percussionist: Not my fault you can't.

Captain: You're a faggot.

Percussion: At least I'm not a huge dick.

by Pkshn April 26, 2014

Captain T-Bag

A handsome, athletic douchebag. He's got the world's best body but has fried his brain smoking mass pot. He claims to have given a girl 10 orgasms in an hour. Every girl secretly wants his dick.

*Best friends with Major Dick...

Did you see Captain T-bag today? I LOVE his arms in that cut-off!

by Mssss Lady June 16, 2010