mustache shaming

To deride someone for their facial hair choices; an attempt to cause shame in someone for unpopular mustache and/or beard styles.

Often secretly motivated by envy.

God, what's up with Jason's hideous pornstache pic?

Wow, Eric, you're looking pretty neck beardy there.

My girlfriend was totally mustache shaming me by posting those old photos of me with a soul patch!

by Catemonster August 2, 2012

Mustache Tone

A specific tone of voice that can only be conveyed when owning/having a mustache. Mustache tone is generally highly confident to the point of condescending, with hints of patronizing bravado and overtly masculine diction. Bordering on being an asshole but still somehow slightly appealing.

"That guy at the bar was a chauvanistic asshole. His mustache tone was completely gross."

or

"Larry has closed more sales leads this month than everyone else combined. It must be the mustache tone."

by BigMac1987 December 26, 2012

Milk Mustache

When somebody does a line of coke and you see the powder on the underside of your nose

Person 1: Good morning bro, hey, you got a milk mustache going on there.
Person 2: No wonder why my dad was giving me a funny look

by Big Moist Daddy July 16, 2018

Trojan Mustache

When a guy is denied morning sex by a girl who instead falls back to sleep. As an act of revenge, the guy places a used condom over the sleeping girl's upper lip then leaves.

I left that hoe with a trojan mustache after she wouldn't wake up for an early morning grind session

by j Dr G August 5, 2009

milk mustache

a trail of seamen on a girls upper lip

she blew me until I gave her the ole milk mustache.

by Hairy Palmer January 24, 2003

Mustache Ride

When a person with a mustache has someone sit on their face. As if the mustache were a ride at the carnival, where indecently most of the mustache rides are given.

Tom Sellek: Hey there, would you enjoy a mustache ride?
Burt Reynolds: I was about to ask you the same thing

by team honey badger December 7, 2011

dick mustache

A hairstyle below the male midriff, which consists of the pubic hair above the penis being completely shaven, and the testicles left unshaven, with hair. The genitalia will then be comparable to a mustache, as the penis acts as the nose.

He said he started out shaving his pubes above my penis, and when he finished and was about to start the balls, he realized it looked kind good, so he a dick mustache.

by TangClock March 6, 2009