Skip to main content

traffiction

Traffiction is a fabricated or embellished story detailing a chaotic scene of gridlock conceived and delivered in an effort to explain one’s tardiness or absence from work / a party / your wedding / etc.

Good things to reference when telling a traffictional story:
1. Man on fire (include details like, “waving his arms wildly”)
2. Godzilla
3. Broken-down bus of cheerleaders
4. Volcanic eruption
5. Scene from Armageddon (just don’t mention Bruce Willis)
6. Sanjaya
Example of traffiction:
Wow, I know I’m late, but there was the most incredible accident on the Beltway that tied me up for hours! I was moving along making great time, when up ahead I could just make out a cow wandering onto the highway. I guess the tractor trailer ahead of me didn’t see it –he must have been going at least 80 mph. The explosive impact had cars screeching to a halt and ended in a massive pileup. I was able to stop in time, but it still took the workers and clean-up crew several hours to carve a path through the cars and meat. As I finally passed by the (now totaled) tractor trailer, I noticed the mangled Chick-fil-a logo…irony can be so cruel. So, anyway…did I miss the birth of our son?
by Trevor Browne December 28, 2008
mugGet the traffiction mug.

traffic

the movement of something. Could be cars, drugs, people for sex, ushually something illegal and something you should not do.
by ppy_luv July 2, 2008
mugGet the traffic mug.

Blunt Traffic Jam

When two or more blunts rotate around a circle at different speeds, eventually causing a blunt to "Traffic Jam" behind the other blunt(s).
Yo man, hurry up and pass that blunt, there's about to be a B.T.J. (Blunt Traffic Jam)!
by Dr. Julius Erving December 2, 2010
mugGet the Blunt Traffic Jam mug.

Traffic Sign

A common tattoo located at the lower back of some females. Basically to direct a (stoned) male where to put his genitalia.
Without seeing Lisa's traffic sign, Chad would have been to stoned to find her pussy.
by mjoblio May 31, 2004
mugGet the Traffic Sign mug.

taeffected

An amazing kpop stan that’s known for umm...
Girl : Did you see taeffecteds new video?
Other girl : Yeah why?
Girl : you don’t understand?
by Melody... December 22, 2020
mugGet the taeffected mug.

Murphy's Traffic Law

The simple fact of reality which states that whenever one is in a hurry, one or more of the following effects are experienced when driving a car:

-Chance of encountering consecutive red lights is increased.

-When in an intersection, chance of having a left turn larry in your line is increased.

-Chance of getting stuck behind an extremely conservative driver or a naturally slower vehicle is greatly increased.

Basically, the Murphy's Law of driving. If you need to get their fast, you're going to get their less quickly.
Boss - You're late.

Flunky - Sorry. 6 red lights in a row, got stuck behind an 18-wheeler, and it seemed like everyone just wanted to turn left today.

Crony - Murphy's Traffic Law. Respect.
by magzillas November 7, 2010
mugGet the Murphy's Traffic Law mug.

traffic lights

a game played by stoners.

usually played with between 2 and 10 people

first take 1 toke hold it pass it when the joint gets back to you breathe out and take 2 tokes hold it . then 3 tokes back to 2 then one. works well with foot longs
dude skin up lets play traffic lights.
by shiest miest April 9, 2010
mugGet the traffic lights mug.

Share this definition

Sign in to vote

We'll email you a link to sign in instantly.

Or

Check your email

We sent a link to

Open your email