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Chonkism

Chonkism is an ancient spiritual movement centered on the reverence of chonkiness as a sacred essence and celestial spirit of feline being. It celebrates the robust, serene presence of plump cats, positing that all felines embody an angelic quality through their chonkiness.

Chonkism lacks a moral framework, viewing chonkiness as inherently neutral—capable of manifesting as a state of divine grace or, in those lacking discipline and structure, as a degenerative state of shadowy imbalance. This timeless ambiguity has inspired two evolving perspectives: "Hammonism" and "Chonkianity", offering paths to study and explore the philosophy of chonkiness further.
"I feel spiritually uplifted by this cat's eternal chonkiness—he is a very good purrveyor of Chonkism!"

"I am beginning to worry that my cat's chonkiness is not being appropriately honored—if I don't stage a spiritual intervention, this could impact him/her negatively."
by Church of the Mighty Ham October 8, 2025
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One-Towel Chinois

A tight-arse strainer that's Chinese, and difficult to understand. I.E. Kirk Barry
Kirk Barry is such a One-Towel Chinois
by Websters Dictionary Current April 29, 2011
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