Shave Your Beard

To tell someone off over something pointless or ridiculous. Used when your friend is rambling about something that isn’t even your business and you just have to get him to shut the fuck up.

Ron: Yo bro! I talked to that Adrianna girl in school today. She’ll be my prom date! Isn’t this so ex-

Peter: Shave your beard, Ron.

Ron: What?

Peter: I said shave your beard Ron!

by IAmTheOneWhoShits December 9, 2024

Velcro-beard

When you have a short beard and like velcro it catches onto things like hair, your shirt, and other clothing. It’s usually painful.

I love hugging my son, but he always gets velcro-beard in my hair.

Ouch! I keep getting velcro-beard in my sweater.

by I_caveman August 21, 2019

Toby Beard

Annoying mf who eats mc wraps 24/7 and defo fancies erin white

Wow, toby beard is broke as fuck! hes defo not made a trench outing game.

by prestige light skin October 9, 2022

Bearded clam

Bearded clam:
A soy boy, white night, male feminist that wears a beard that is immensely disproportionate to his diminished masculinity.

Dude, this 100 lb. guy walked into the cigar shop with skinny jeans, a man bun and a huge beard, what a bearded clam he was!

by thinkinman February 18, 2020

D-beard

Short for "douche-beard." An asinine beard sported by somebody who is trying to be a hipster. Does not need to be worn by an actual douchebag but this generally helps in identification of the species. With the current infatuation with beards, the d-beard is becoming more prevalent.

Did you see that guy just walk in? Color Me Bad wants their d-beard back.

by FindingRachael November 29, 2015

fart beard

The significant other to which a man or woman blames an obvious fart (noun); to blame a self-made fart on a significant other - or possibly a family pet (verb).

Hey now, don't beard that fart on me bebe - or -He was cool to claim the blame, but I was sitting next to her - I think he was her fart beard.

by mfrogz June 30, 2015

beard crush

a fake crush on the opposite sex that one makes public in order to appear heterosexual

“I don’t really like Ashley, she’s just a beard crush. I really like Adam...”

by liptenneth May 10, 2020