apple customer service

quite possibly the worst customer service you can possibly run into. full of stink-ass arabians, indians, dumbshits and bimbos,

apple customer service:sir what is your name

me:brandon ****

apple:rick??

me:just help me with my problem

apple:what is it sir

me:this piece of overpriced shit is acting up and is erasing music by itself

apple:...

me:help me

apple:let me look it up

me:wtf? why you work at apple you should know about your own fucking product

apple:sir read off your ipod main menu

me:about,shuffle,repeat.playback.general.date&time...

apple:read off your iPOD menu

me:i just did you dipshit. fuck you go to college

by fuckapple123 June 26, 2010

customoron

idiotic customer, irritating customer, the way you are treated in some shops

The customoron was asking for Jane Austen in the periodicals section.

by bestselling February 24, 2008

HM customs & excise

(n.) Her Majesty's custom and excise, who control most of British taxation, and really don't give a shit that it's too much, so shut up and pay, you working class daily star and the sun readers who bitch about the government.

HM customs & excise will amalgamate themselves with the Inland Revenue in a few years.

by Kung-Fu Jesus May 6, 2004

customer

n. trucker term for the person with whom a law enforcement officer is currently occupied. When the cop has a customer, he can't come after you.

Oh no, there's the fuzz! Oh, nevermind. He's got a customer. Hammer down!

by fizzle October 10, 2005

Customerising

The process of taking a written passage and editing it to be acceptable for sending to customers.

"Thankyou for your comprehensive engineering report. I will spend tomorrow customerising it before forwarding it externally"

by CraigBrianYoung October 13, 2008

Clustomer

When multiple people enter an establishment to make only a single transaction, unnecessarily complicating a simple job by sheer weight of numbers.

Five students holding a table by ordering a single beer; that's a clustomer.
I'll call you back, a clustomer just walked in. I'll need a drink after this.

by Bobannaliffia May 4, 2015

Rental Car Customer

A person who functions on a lesser level of mentality than most bean sprouts. These people are characterized by their innane questions and poor use of grammar and sentence structure. Also, when confronted with situations they cannot comprehend (example: A sum of money IS required in exchange for the temporary use of a rental vehicle), they will become enraged and counter with random, irrational screaming. These people are typically met over the telephone, and are best deterred by such methods as hanging up, or, making farting noises into the receiver until the said person becomes so frustrated by the lack of attention to their ranting that they hang up.

"I was speaking to a rental car customer, and they were upset that the location would not accept their check cashin' cawd...Oh dammit I hate these people! Shoot me!!"

by Angry Man October 25, 2003