To squat down on your toes, reaching under the leg to masturbate in a downward motion.
Common sport amongst contractors working away from home. Of an evening, should they be feeling frisky and risky, they may strip off, carefully climb up on to the B&B’s sink rim, tiptoes on the unsupported edge. Whilst in this expert position he may decide to crab-wank one out whist his face/eye is pressed against the mirror, eyeballing himself until completion.
Common sport amongst contractors working away from home. Of an evening, should they be feeling frisky and risky, they may strip off, carefully climb up on to the B&B’s sink rim, tiptoes on the unsupported edge. Whilst in this expert position he may decide to crab-wank one out whist his face/eye is pressed against the mirror, eyeballing himself until completion.
Martin: How was your evening Andy?
Andy: Pretty tragic really.
Martin: But I thought you had your night planned? Kebab and a crab-wank you said??
Andy: The kebab was great and I was after a thrill before bed.
Martin: What’s tragic about that? Did you manage the expert?
Andy: Almost, but the sink came off the wall and I couldn’t finish.
Martin: Still, better than Steve last year, his sink shattered and cut his femoral artery.
Andy: Hummnn, I may go back to the floor for a bit…
Andy: Pretty tragic really.
Martin: But I thought you had your night planned? Kebab and a crab-wank you said??
Andy: The kebab was great and I was after a thrill before bed.
Martin: What’s tragic about that? Did you manage the expert?
Andy: Almost, but the sink came off the wall and I couldn’t finish.
Martin: Still, better than Steve last year, his sink shattered and cut his femoral artery.
Andy: Hummnn, I may go back to the floor for a bit…
by Goatboy Grasshead June 8, 2021
Get the Crab-Wank mug.During coitus, one partner (or a third person) inserts their full hand into the anus of the woman and grasps the man's penis through the walls of the rectum and vagina. They then proceed to masturbate the penis while simultaneously fisting the woman rectally.
by Inoffensive_Account August 20, 2016
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Just fuck off, Phil, you've got too much wank bucketedness about you.
Just fuck off, Phil, you've got too much wank bucketedness about you.
by Johnny6162 September 15, 2022
Get the wank bucketedness mug.A danger rank is were you start Wanking/Masturbating/Pulling The Ham/ Beating Your Meat/ Tickling The Pickle/ Kissing The Pork etc. You call your mother or father into the room and try to finish before they enter. Victors of this challenge will be praised and have the right to boast about it, if they do not become the leader of the group then get new friends. Of course there will be contesters, there always is. Time yourself next time.
Jim: How come your the leader of the group?
Bob: I performed a danger wank and succeeded!
Jim: Holy shit! All praise lord Bob
Bob: I performed a danger wank and succeeded!
Jim: Holy shit! All praise lord Bob
by BigLadGreggs March 9, 2020
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Get the Wank shit mug.When you cause someone who is epileptic to have a seizure while they are holding their penis, causing them to have a seizure and tuss off at the same time
by Seabridge Memester June 6, 2016
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