Abra-Ham Lincoln Log

A guy that really likes ham and Lincoln logs. He was a president, for some reason. He might have gone to a play to show the biggest Lincoln log tower and it not falling over, and putting ham sandwiches between each piece and eating the ham sandwiches without it falling over. Then, John Walks Booth said that Lincoln didn't go through the walking booth. So John Walks Booth assassinated him, making the tower fall.

Abra-Ham Lincoln Log: AND TODAY I WILL EAT THESE HAM SANDWICHES!!!
John Walks Booth: Wait a minute! You didn't get a Walking Ticket from the Walking Booth!
Abra-Ham Lincoln Log: I-I don't need one if I'm on stag-
John Walks Booth: I don't wanna hear it! "pulls out his glock"
Abra-Ham Lincoln Log: WAIT WAIT WAIT, NO WE CAN WORK THIS OUT!! I'LL GET A TICKE-"Gets shot"
Abra-Ham Lincoln Log after dead: Damn It, I was gonna get the world record for most sandwiches eaten between Lincoln logs.

by AStrunkMan69 July 4, 2022

Log Leg

When a girl sits on your lap and takes dump.

I can't believe that crazy girl gave me a log leg. I don't ever ask for that.

by Chinook17 August 10, 2022

Log bait

The person who is reading this has just been log baited. Also used to end a phone call.

Person 1: hey matt
Person 2: what

Person 1: log bait (hangs up)

by Ug8tar August 12, 2022

Slammin’ logs

A common misconception regarding bigfoot, Slammin’ Logs is often thought of as the sasquatch banging large logs together to make noise. In reality this activity is only aggressively finger your own or an expiremeting parter’s rectum immediately after using the bathroom.

“Hey babe, i just finished up in the bathroom. Want to try something mew and start Slammin’ Logs?”

by C@rb0nm0n0 August 21, 2022

log rocket

a fat meaty penis

My boy John has quite the log rocket. You can see the imprint through his shorts!

by bigboi10928 August 29, 2022

standing log

When you shit and the turd stands straight up and falls over, crushing your balls and anything else in their path

Friend A: "Sorry dude, I can't go to gym today, I got hit with a standing log"
Friend B: "damn bro"

by Creambythedozen October 27, 2022

white Christmas log

This is a scenario in which a female (lactating mom) “in a surprise fashion” lactating on
Your Partner whilst they are going to the bathroom and is in mid poop on the toilet. Making your partner feel like they are getting a cold shower of breast milk.

Suddenly as I looked up I was getting showered with my wife’s breast milk instead of saying I am pooping here and freaking out you say “stop giving me a white Christmas log”

Or

Why am I getting sprayed on by … ahh! You white Christmas logged me!

by ask_about_my_winston2 November 15, 2022