Speeding ticket

When you, a retard that can’t just STAY IN THE FUCKING SPEED LIMIT, BECAUSE YOU ARE A RECKLESS AND DESTRUCTIVE DUMBASS, get pulled over for speeding. Dropping a gear and disappearing is also considered evading and eluding arrest; don’t do it. 1; now if you get caught you get punished MORE, dumbass, and 2; you’ll hit something and die for being a retard with a crotch rocket superbike wreck for a brain.

Respectable Sheriff: “Sir, did you even know how fucking fast you were go-“
Recipient of speeding ticket: *Drops a gear and tries to disappear, runs into an F-450, getting his blood and guts dragged across a road after being launched.*
Respectable Sheriff: “Holy shit… I’m just gonna call that one in……”
You can die, dumbass. Hold your horses and be reasonable. Have some fucking patience. Get there early, get there late; doesn’t matter. Just fucking get there and don’t die. It helps.

by The ceo of shit Cold War guns April 22, 2023

Flag

Get the Speeding ticketmug.

Chase the Speed Demon

My boy Chase is as fast as a cheetah on the track and in the bedroom. He's a personal magnet attracting the men and the women. He's so fast your butthole will be demolished in a second.

Chase the Speed Demon is so fast he dusts you before you can even say gay

by Big Daddy Smatty April 13, 2022

Flag

Get the Chase the Speed Demonmug.

Caviar at fish stick prices on McDonald's speed

The sentence expresses incredulity about whether someone expects to receive high-quality service comparable to the price of caviar (luxury) but delivered as quickly as service at McDonald's (known for fast food).

Do they expect services like Caviar at fish stick prices on McDonald's speed?! - Gilfoyle

by C.Gilfoyle July 3, 2024

Flag