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Canada's History

When you fist your girl in the ass and fuck her in the ear 69 style, and you come so hard it shoots her eyes out. While this happens, you pull your hand out so that her built-up shits end up in your face.
"Yo dude did you get with that chick?"
"Yeah man, we studied some of canada's history"
"yikes, she's not winning that rifle shooting meet tomorrow"
"fuck that, dude, my face stinks."
by GerryWithAG February 4, 2010
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Canada's History

A sexual game involving two or more people, where the parties involved mutually insert pieces of hockey equipment into the anal cavity. The game is played on a point system, where different pieces of equipment are worth different points. For example, a puck is worth 5 points and a hockey stick is worth 3 points for every inch that the receiving partner can insert into the anal cavity. If any participant is able to insert an entire goalie mask into the cavity, that person is automatically declared the winner.

Notes:
Personal lubricant is allowed for this game, as long as all partners are using equal amounts, and as long as the lubricant is maple syrup.

In Canada, the game is usually played with music from the band Rush and taped skits from the show SCTV playing in the background.
Tom was complaining of soreness after a long night of playing "Canada's History."
by NothingAsItSeems February 5, 2010
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Canada's History

A grandMILF's moose knuckle.
Whoa, check out the Canada's History on that old lady!
by meatless February 4, 2010
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Canada's History

Canada's History is a sexual act in which both the male and female take a large shit on the corner of their bed. They then go to sleep and never bother to clean it up every again symbolizing that Canada's history is basically a bunch of shit no one even cares enough about to clean up.
Jim, "So me and Lisa performed a Canada's History last night, turns out its not hot or romantic at all"

Mark, "no shit" (pun intended)
by Dabsters February 6, 2010
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Canada's History

A furry, buck-toothed rag you could wring for eternity and never squelch a drop of blood or semen. Formerly called "The Beaver." Flag modelled after the quintessential Canadian still life, "Politely Railing a Virgin From a Safe Distance!" See also, The Juices of My Labour.
When you throw Canada's History against the wall, you're lucky if you get hit with a lawsuit!
by Jimmy Kicks February 5, 2010
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Canada's History

A grotesque sexual act where the snow of an igloo and the feces of a polar bear is shoved into the rectum of a female. Moose feces can also be used.
Sarah loves Canada's History after a few Labatt beers.
by ultradowney February 4, 2010
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Canada's History

The most repulsive sex act known to mankind, involving moose antlers, a jug of maple syrup, and the Stanley Cup.

1. Don't be a Noob, remember the lube!

2. Fill up woman with maple syrup by use of anal beer bong.

3. Store Stanley Cup in male's rectum

4. Woman must spray maple syrup from butt into Stanley Cup in the man's rectum.

5. Hollow out antlers to function as "crazy-fun-straw" to drink maple syrup from man's rectum.

6. Rinse, repeat, maybe switching gender roles.

7. Proceed to make sensitive, passionate love.
"Could you help me with the groceries, honey? I'm a little sore from when Condoleeza Rice gave me an in-depth reenaction of Canada's History yesterday."

"Sure, okay Dad..."
by KT151LN February 4, 2010
mugGet the Canada's Historymug.

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