Masturbating

what you do when you see your Grandpa.

Grandpa: *leaves room*

You: *Starts jerking off and Masturbating*

by The master of masturbating November 16, 2020

Audible Masturbation

Talking just to please yourself.

Twitter is a great place to see audible masturbation at work, Or a trump speech.

by Z_PW January 14, 2021

masturbated

fucking yourself

i masturbated yesterday and I came so much

by cummer5000 May 22, 2023

To Masturbate

An attempt to pointlessly satisfy an irrational urge in the short term.

(where in the long term on further reflection you realise it to be truly unsatisfactory)

"Sometimes I try to masturbate a really long or difficult word into a sentence just to feel I'm smarter than I actually am!"

by anonymous January 14, 2021

Third person masturbating

To pleasure oneself in a mirror to a picture of oneself.

I walked into the bathroom to see Chad watching himself in the mirror jerking off to a picture of himself.. he was third person masturbating

by Professional ego striker January 4, 2025

Masturbating

what you do when you see your Grandpa.

Grandpa: *leaves room*

You: *Starts jerking off and Masturbating*

by The master of masturbating November 16, 2020

Chronic Masturbation

When you are a socially inep involuntarily celibate due to poor dating and social skills, and sees porn every day and leaving cum stains everywhere in your house nonstop, as a way to cope with loneliness. Never goes out, doesn't exercise nor does improve social skills, and yet this special type of breeds can usually be found moderating around Discord, Tumblr, and Reddit as power-hungry mods or working remotely in a part-time job as a twitter moderator.

Jerry never finds a way to prevent chronic masturbation. He clearly didn't recover after getting rejected by Stacy for not being himself a Chad, as he believes.

by TheKamikazeMonkeys February 27, 2023