The very essence of UBC Computer Science professors. Unfortunately this disorder passes onto its top students as well.
You need to pay each of the masturbation professors a total whopping sum of 1 million dollars per course per term as they masturbate on both the male and female instagram profiles of their students and talk incoherently in lectures just to pass time and disorient their prey.
by MatrixEnergeticWar September 10, 2023
Get the masturbation professormug. When you are so depressed that it's your only way of escape. Sure you can get pleasure from it, but it's temporary. And then you get even more depressed. Like cigarettes, It begins as a very fun and new and exciting process, given that you just discovered your puberty. But over the years, you just get tired of it.
You get tired over it and want to stop this once and for all. But you can't. You can't because it's just so addicting. It's basically self harm but a lot, lot less painful and harmful. But its still tiring. You can't stop. You regret ever starting it. But it's your only way of escape, from all your pain, suffering, and tiredness. Ever time you masturbate, you feel absolutely ashamed, pathetic, miserable and like an absolute piece of shit.
You start by feeling horny as fuck, either you probably open p*rn or just create pictures in your head of whatever fetish you have. I mostly have a fetish of female neck movement, and (partly) NATURAL and NOT FORCED female hiccups and burps. Enough of that. After that you hold your cock or shove in pussy (depends if you're a boy or girl. I am of the former.) And then you pleasure yourself as if you're having sex, but you actually don't. Many use lubricants like lotion or oil, or soap when you're in shower. but I personally prefer dry. I mostly masturbate during shower and before sleep. It's shitty, really.
You get tired over it and want to stop this once and for all. But you can't. You can't because it's just so addicting. It's basically self harm but a lot, lot less painful and harmful. But its still tiring. You can't stop. You regret ever starting it. But it's your only way of escape, from all your pain, suffering, and tiredness. Ever time you masturbate, you feel absolutely ashamed, pathetic, miserable and like an absolute piece of shit.
You start by feeling horny as fuck, either you probably open p*rn or just create pictures in your head of whatever fetish you have. I mostly have a fetish of female neck movement, and (partly) NATURAL and NOT FORCED female hiccups and burps. Enough of that. After that you hold your cock or shove in pussy (depends if you're a boy or girl. I am of the former.) And then you pleasure yourself as if you're having sex, but you actually don't. Many use lubricants like lotion or oil, or soap when you're in shower. but I personally prefer dry. I mostly masturbate during shower and before sleep. It's shitty, really.
Corbin: *goes to sleepover and can't masturbate*
Corbin: "guess I won't sleep today. I really need to masturbate. But I don't wanna. Man, my life just keep getting shitter."
Corbin: "guess I won't sleep today. I really need to masturbate. But I don't wanna. Man, my life just keep getting shitter."
by Joshua Joestar (MvN) June 20, 2022
Get the Masturbatemug. by Angel234IsTheDarkSeraphim April 25, 2025
Get the <.04.45.2025.>Masturbating Like A Degenerate<.04.45.2025.>mug. by Glizzy_lizzy September 12, 2022
Get the National Masturbation daymug. by deezgonnasuicide November 10, 2021
Get the masturbatedmug. To sooth the shaft. To calm the shaft. The act of one's self meditating and endulging the shaft. Commonly done in front of your grandma. Often robots will struggle to find similar stimulation, unless enough OIL is provided. Make sure your grandma sees however, otherwise process will not work. Your shaft will not work.
"yo bro pp work does yours?"
"dude no what the frick? shaft cam masturbate i try to!"
"grandma room she in is?"
"no course of not is she what?!"
"well don't wonder why working it isn't pepe shaft does not fuction?!"
"dude no what the frick? shaft cam masturbate i try to!"
"grandma room she in is?"
"no course of not is she what?!"
"well don't wonder why working it isn't pepe shaft does not fuction?!"
by peepeepoopypoo March 3, 2020
Get the masturbatemug. <.0.6.7.6.>Psychosomatically Masturbating PsychosocomaticallyarisesisasAresesisaPsychomaticau <.0.6.7.6.0.>
<.0.6.7.6.>Psychosomatically Masturbating PsychosocomaticallyarisesisasAresesisaPsychomaticau <.0.6.7.6.0.>
by TheGeneralGenitalsPranksterian May 7, 2025
Get the <.0.6.7.6.>Psychosomatically Masturbating PsychosocomaticallyarisesisasAresesisaPsychomaticau <.0.6.7.6.0.>mug.