UC Irvine Football

A non-existent college football program.

Dodger Mike and Mark Ondo tailgate in the parking lot drinking beverages.

Dodger Mike: Today's the day we end our 25-game losing streak to Riverside!

Mark Ondo: No one fucks with UC Irvine Football! Roll Eaters!

Dodger Mike: Zot! Zot! Zot!

Dodger Mike goes Bills Mafia and breaks a folding table in half.

Mark: That table is DEAD DEAD DEAD! Eaters Mafia Baby!

Dodger Mike and Mark fist bump and then pass out drunk, which causes them to miss the game.

by ZXY&ABC October 9, 2022

International Football Month

November was the official Month the best sport on earth was invented.

International Football Month is the best month ever

by WorldFootballPresident June 16, 2024

Play football

In Madden, punting or kicking on 4th down instead of running a normal play to get the first down.

"This game is too close, I gotta play football"

by darthgaber66 June 16, 2025

football

The sport that suck and marching band is so much better then. Band gets more trophy's then the football and the band does not have bench warmers.

The football team sucks. The people only come for the half time show from the band

by 871263489725t2187ry1289try9128 February 12, 2019

OCONUS Football

Soccer outside of the USA. It helps to avoid confusion with American Football.

Was watching OCONUS football yesterday, Tottenham killed it!

by NewEnglandForLife September 27, 2021

Football fellatio

The act of compressing, rubbing, massaging or deflating a football to break it in to the specifications of a quarterback.

I saw the trainer in the locker room performing football fellatio on several balls to get them ready for the big game. quarterback special, pigskin patdown, ball busting, football fondling, football flaccidity

by joecoolthefool February 11, 2015

kiss a football player day

October 4th is the official “Kiss a football player” day!

“Hey! Let’s kiss, it’s October 4th”
“What does that mean?”
“It’s national kiss a football player day!”

by helonat0 October 2, 2021