Closet commando. Those who romanticize or mimic military or police forces, weaponry and gear, yet have no real working knowledge or experience regarding them.
A closet commando usually likes to dress the part in tactical or military gear to “cosplay” as a military/militia member
A closet commando usually likes to dress the part in tactical or military gear to “cosplay” as a military/militia member
John boy likes to show over his AR-15 and dresses up in tactical gear at the gun range but he’s really just a closet commando
by Rook May 20, 2024
Get the closet commando mug.Closet multitasking is when you show up for remote meetings pretending to be in attendance but really working on something else.
Bob: Did you hear in the staff meeting that no one can take vacation in February?
Jane: No. Did Fred say that?
Bob: Absolutely. What were you closet multitasking?
The Boss: Jim, How are sales doing?
Me: crickets - no reply
The Boss: WTF, Jim? You closet multitasking?
Jane: No. Did Fred say that?
Bob: Absolutely. What were you closet multitasking?
The Boss: Jim, How are sales doing?
Me: crickets - no reply
The Boss: WTF, Jim? You closet multitasking?
by jfburke619 January 26, 2021
Get the closet multitasking mug.by Grizzly Gaddis March 10, 2011
Get the Closet-Kink mug.An ex that sends unsolicited masterbation videos from their closet to try and lure someone back into their narcissistic lair.
by Hoslaya October 22, 2025
Get the Closet Bunny mug.