Newton's Log

n. the phenomenon of excrement being forced from one's anus when lifting a sufficiently heavy object. The square of the velocity of the excrement is proportional to the mass of the object being lifted assuming constant excremental mass and constant acceleration of the object being lifted.

To every action there is always an equal and opposite reaction: or the forces of two bodies, one being the force required to move an object away from the center of a gravitational field and the other being poo directed toward the center of the same gravitational field, on each other are always equal and are directed in opposite directions.
I had a bad case of the mudbutt earlier this morning and my situation just got so much worse. Newton's Log just caused me to spray a conical mist of liquid ass all over the room. I need to change my pants, underwear and the curtains.
by MicahtheDangerous January 24, 2011
Get the Newton's Log mug.

Newton's Fatal

When you are double penetrating with your best mate, and your balls collide with one another, like a Newton's Cradle.

Instead of demonstrating the conservation of momentum and the conservation of energy, the collision of the two hairy ball bags sets off a catastrophic reaction, in turn causes the receiving party of said penetration to inflate like a blow up doll. This is due to the uncontrollable amount of semen created by the Newton's fatal.

If you are unable to visualise the inflated party in this scenario, it's fairly similar to when Violet Beauregarde turns into a Giant Blueberry. Although, the mass of the seminal fluid will ground the person in question, preventing them from floating up into the atmosphere
Melanie won't be in work today, she's suffered a Newton's Fatal.
by JBunnie February 16, 2022
Get the Newton's Fatal mug.

Newton street

Probably the most undeniably filthy and horrible place to be in Sydney, a little street at the back of Redfern in Eveleigh loaded with housing commission, filled with ice, needles, junkies and lowlife scum in general.
Let’s cut through that back street there!

No that’s Newton street fuck that!

What’s wrong with that?

Nah, haven’t you heard? That’s the place to get rolled, my mate got bashed for his wallet the other day there by a pack of ferals!
by PigRap1st September 27, 2019
Get the Newton street mug.

Newton titties

N breast that pendulate on a radial axis and when one is acted upon by force as to set in motion in such a way that it collides with the other subsequently transferring the force or kinetic energy to the adjacent breast. Basically swinging tits that emulate newton balls. Typically found on sporty older women (gilf type) that cruise braless in bars.
Damn Ron, look at the Newton Titties on that old lady, now that's kinetic energy at work!
by Jellubuiscuit July 17, 2013
Get the Newton titties mug.

Fig Newton

A mediocre guy either in looks, personality, or both. And although he is average in every way, he thinks he is basically Ryan Reynolds.
While they may stay fig newtons forever it is possible for them to transform into something…like an Oreo…..or even a chocolate chip cookie.
While they are rare, fig newtons can also be female.

Examples: Jeff and Lester from the TV show Chuck
Dwight from the office.

Frollo from Hunchback of Norte Dame
Farquad from Shrek
Prince Charming from Shrek 2
Hans from Frozen
J’son (Starlord’s ‘Dad’) from Guardians of the Galaxy 2
Mr. Collins from Pride and Prejudice (honorable mention Mr. Wickham)
Yeah, we talked a bit. But, he was a bit of a fig Newton so I’m not interested.

Oh, nah! He a fig newton.

He got that fig newton haircut.

He talks like a fig newton.

He was the figgiest of newtons.
by notafignewton March 27, 2022
Get the Fig Newton mug.

NEWTON FORD

The act of inserting a fig newton cookie into the anus of a sex partner prior to anal intercourse in the back seat of a car. If the cookie survives the act intact, it is usually referred to as a ford newton with cream.
Occasionally, to save money, we just go for a drive and have a newton ford for dessert.
by El Fuego Verga February 19, 2010
Get the NEWTON FORD mug.

Newton Balls

When a man's two testicle collide within the scrotum resulting in a painful feeling. Much like that desk toy with the swinging balls.
Why'd you stop running?
I have Newton Balls
by Gordonopus September 05, 2010
Get the Newton Balls mug.