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Wankers pouch

An optional large rectangular side pouch usually worn on the duty belt of a police officer. If you wear this pouch you are a wanker.
Oh my god john is wearing the wankers pouch he must be a wanker
by thenameisname June 19, 2020
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The West Greene Wanker

The Legend of the West Greene Wanker

In the shadowed corridors of West Greene High, hidden in the hills of East Tennessee. one name lingers: the West Greene Wanker. A visionary of chaos and charisma, he roamed the bleachers and bathrooms where not but a few knew his name till that fabled day.

To the faculty, he was a disruption. To the students, a prophet. His titles were many, bestowed by those who witnessed his antics with awe and confusion: Bleacher Beater, Enrichment Edger, Gymnasium Gooner, and the ever-infamous Junior Jerker. No one knows what sparked the sudden urge of goonery that day, what mysterious force beheld upon him to unleash chaos right then and there.

His behavior defied explanation. The unedgeucated saw chaos, the enlightened saw performance art. The administration, lacking the Intelligence to decode his gospel of goonery, responded with drastic force. Confirmed by school officials, he was suspended for five days. The ABIC placement was pure fiction, spread by goonsciples hungry for myth, Though the official record shows just a five-day suspension, we the Goonsciples hold firm to the prophecy: he will not walk those halls again. His path now leads to the sacred solitude of homeschooling, where his goonery can ferment unbound.

It is said that if he returns, the lockers will rattle, the claps will rise, and the spirit of goonery will be reborn. Until then, his absence felt like a missing page in the yearbook.
When we needed him most the The West Greene Wanker was gone, leaving only echoes of chaos and his despair, and goonery gone

By Goonciple IV, September 10, 2025
by Goonsiple IV September 10, 2025
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hair wanker

Someone who masturbates onto a partners hair whilst partner is asleep
by chrispayne81 April 19, 2017
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Wanker

The term "wanker" was coined by the British government in 1951 to be used in reference to the crown's subjects.
"There are wankers all over the world. The sun never sets on wankers."
by Boring Aaron October 28, 2018
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Wetsuit Wanker

A kook from the Inland Empire who tans in a wetsuit to score chicks
I caught Johnny sprawled out in his wetsuit in the backyard yesterday, what a wetsuit wanker.
by Hang Eleven December 20, 2020
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Big Fat Wanker Dyke

This is a term given to people who are often abnormally tall and will, without question, eat anything. This can be anything from leftovers to jars of brine.

They have a strange tendency to wear sunglasses indoors in a futile attempt to cover up the damage of the previous evening, often spent with short chavs.

The sister term, 'bellend', which summarises the above, is sometimes used when time is of the essence, or to finish off a sentence which already includes the term, Big Fat Wanker Dyke
"Look at that Big Fat Wanker Dyke eating everyone's leftovers and drinking that brine from the finished olive jar, what a total bellend."

"I know. It's a good job she's wearing her sun glasses indoors though, otherwise she'd look proper hanging. No doubt was with that short chav again!"
by J Bizzness Time August 22, 2011
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pizza oven wanker

Someone with far to much money from flying planes that has taken the art of cooking pizza far to seriously
Check out my new pizza oven

Shut up Greg you pizza oven wanker
by Pastaloverjames November 7, 2020
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