Happy cracker

The homosexual act of scraping the smegma of an uncircumcised penis and spreading it onto a ritz cracker, then feeding the cracker to your partner.

Paul: My boyfriend, Jerry, surprised me yesterday morning with a happy cracker.

by KevinCake October 6, 2012

Cracker Dick

(N) An insult; an allusion to a fake medical condition that results in the fragility of male genitalia.

Doctor: We ran some tests, and it turns out you have cracker dick.
Patient: Damn, shouldn't have gone on the singers cruise.

Why does Jason keep a towel over his junk?
Oh he's got cracker dick, it'll get soggy if it gets wet

by DiabloRain October 22, 2014

cracker cakes

Cracker Cakes (n.): This particular food is often referred to as a rice cake, and is a flat circle of tasteless dried rice and nearly weightless. Since only white people are the main consumers of theses delicacies they can also be called a cracker (term for white person as well as type of food) cake. More specifically, white women dieting are the largest demographic for this flavorless snack.

Can we please stop by whole foods quickly so I can fill up on cracker cakes before we go to the gallery opening?

by sucio2 August 13, 2010

Couch Cracker

an old stanky cracker stuck in a couch. lazy, stale, crusty, grodey, and just all around foul person

YO, you're a stanky ass couch cracker!

by Kyle/lyle March 29, 2009

Dead Crackers

A funny substitute for DeadA$$.

Are you "DEADCRACKERS" right now?
Dead Crackers though, you need to hop off.

by cj2009cj February 4, 2012

wonky cracker

a weird, messed-up or otherwise insane person, often a co-worker; useful for times when "fuck-face" and "sweet merciful motherfucker" might not be appropriate

"She is the most incompetent person I've ever worked with; she's such a wonky cracker!"

by Cristos April 26, 2006

Cracker Music

Shit white people listen to

Angelic asked Diamond why she was listen to that cracker music

by Mahny June 16, 2017