Closet-tweaker

A person who uses meth by themselves and keeps it a secret. Usually because they are ashamed or afraid of judgement.

It's crazy that Tony is a closet-tweaker, since he always seemed like a stoner.

by Mysterrii August 21, 2021

Whisper closet

Noun. The natural habitat of a housemother

"Welcome to the sewing room, are you looking for the housemother? She's back in the whisper closet taking measurements on the next birthday child."

by Meinefresser July 25, 2025

closet commando

Closet Commando. A person who romanticizes military or police forces, weaponry and gear, yet have no real working knowledge or experience regarding them.
A closet commando usually likes to dress the part in tactical or military gear to mimic a military/militia member for fun.

John boy talks a big game about his AR—15 and likes posing in his tactical vest but he’s just a closet commando

by Rook May 20, 2024

closet fucking

Engaging in sexual intercourse inside of a closet. In some cases it is a fetish for the thrill of hiding or getting "caught".

Eric and I were closet fucking because we didn't want his friend Jenny to hear us while she played call of duty. After the closet fucking he passed out and I built a snowman with Jenny.

by POTtybreak August 25, 2016

Sweaty Closet

When a group of friends, usually 3+, get in a small closet and hotbox with pot.

"Hey bros, let's go hop in my Sweaty Closet!"

by Spoodes July 13, 2016

prayer closet

a euphemism for an S&M dungeon

"It's been a tough week at the senate committee hearing. Can't wait to get some me time in my prayer closet."

by mcgruffallo March 27, 2019

Closet Republican

The kinda guy who lives on the East or West coast (usually high income) and reluctantly votes for the Republicans mostly because he doesn’t want to pay the Democrat’s proposed taxes. He often goes to great lengths to appease his liberal friends in conversation and not let them know who he voted for.

“That guy is such a closet Republican, there’s no way he’s pro taxes with a house like that.”
“He’s such an obvious appeaser, like some closet Republican trying to fit in.”

by Henrey S March 21, 2024