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Don't wipe your ass before you shit

1.An expression you use to tell a person to stop bragging who claims victory before a brawl,race,match,competiion or any other event that has yet to happen.
A)
Kevin: let's see who has the speed to make it to the finish line quicker.

Eric: Man I got this,I'm gonna murk your ass!!

Kevin: Don't wipe your ass before you shit Eric ;it's not over till is over.

B)
Eric:10 bucks I get a better grade in my physics test?

BeHa: Man you always say that but you always fail,don't wipe your ass before shit!!!!

Jack: Yo Eric you ain't beating noone shut upp!!!

Mick: Yea don't wipe your ass before shit!!!
by BeHa February 20, 2011
mugGet the Don't wipe your ass before you shitmug.

Shit so thick you could stir it with a stick

When you’ve had a particularly hard day, and the problems are getting to you; a lot of problems.

Coined by R.E.M. in the song “Bad Day”.
“Dude, my day’s been so rough. I’ve got shit so thick you could stir it with a stick.”
by MaybeARealWord March 30, 2021
mugGet the Shit so thick you could stir it with a stickmug.
What you say in a rhythm/beat when you're trying to unclog your sink. Made popular by Charles Green from Angry Grandpa.
"Motherfucking piece of shit, unclog you god damn whore dog dick!
I FUCKING HATE YOU!"
by BATMN every day December 14, 2018
mugGet the motherfucking piece of shit, unclog you god damn whore dog dickmug.

you can choose what you eat, you can not choose what you shit

the ridiculous condition of a winner politician who blames the former administrations, to justify the mere fact he is definitely unable.
Who does politics can choose the party to play with, the arguments to fight with, and the equivocal reasons to explain to the electorate, but can not choose the "favourite" priorities, budget deficits, environmental emergencies, and other embarrassing situations.
POLITICIAN: It's not my fault. The former mayor left a huge amount of budget deficit.
TV REPORTER (live): No, man: you can choose what you eat, you can not choose what you shit.
by logao November 4, 2018
mugGet the you can choose what you eat, you can not choose what you shitmug.

Hard to give a shit when you have to take one

The unignorable barely containable urge to take a crap.

For example: You and your mother hurriedly crossing a busy street to the nearest bathroom when she suddenly falls down as you see a bus in the distance quickly closing the gap between it and her. You scream an apology without missing a step asking the other pedestrians to please help her in lue of you trying to save her and shitting your pants in the middle of the road.
For example: You and your mother are hurriedly crossing a busy street to the nearest bathroom when she suddenly falls down and in the same instant see a bus in the distance quickly closing the gap between it and her. You scream an apology without missing a step asking the other pedestrians to please help her (in lue of you trying to save her and shitting your pants in the middle of the road). This would be a case of it being hard to give a shit when you have to take one.
by RyDawg2000 August 5, 2022
mugGet the Hard to give a shit when you have to take onemug.

that shit will fuck you up

when something is so dangerous or strong it will mess you up if you try
Jim - Quit looking at the Fireball that shit will fuck you up.
by ö~ö June 18, 2024
mugGet the that shit will fuck you upmug.

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