Philadelphia Napkin

A dirty cum rag. Often used as a napkin on fancy occasions.

"Jesse, set the table for thanksgiving. Use the good Philadelphia napkins!"

by freudeschoener November 25, 2011

Ham Napkin

A large, floppy labia, usually due to overuse or improper maintenance. Often found in pairs.

Carl: Honey Boo Boo's mom is enormous.

Rico: Yeah, I bet she's got a real nasty set of Ham Napkins.

Carl: I'd still do her. I think I have a problem.

by Gabe Lincoln March 24, 2013

Bed Napkin

The top sheet of the bed. Can be used to wipe bodily fluids off of face after dining.

Honey, where’s the bed napkin so I can wipe the saliva/semen/pussyjuice/santorum off my chin. I’m a big mess! The last time I saw it, it was twisted around my ankles.

by Sad giraffe May 25, 2019

Napkin Friends

Friends you throw away after use

Napkin Friends. Use them. Abuse them. And throw them. (Away?)
Napkins have sad lives.

by SomeoneCoollike March 19, 2010

Soggy Napkin

When you jack off into a napkin and your girlfriend eats it.

I gave her the soggy napkin last night, she puked but totally loved it.

by soggynapkin March 18, 2011

Napkin spitter

When one one or more parties chooses to suck a cock and refuses to swallow the seamen thus choosing to spit into a daisy napkin.

She sucked so hard I thought she was gonna swallow until I realized she was a napkin spitter.

by too infinity and beyond June 12, 2019

Stress Napkin

A piece of paper, napkin or otherwise, used to absorb a load of jizz that a man produces when jerking off to relieve stress.

This has been a crappy day at work. I'm going to grab some stress napkins, go to the bathroom, and have some alone time.

by knightsofsesquipedalia March 17, 2015