Napkin spitter

When one one or more parties chooses to suck a cock and refuses to swallow the seamen thus choosing to spit into a daisy napkin.

She sucked so hard I thought she was gonna swallow until I realized she was a napkin spitter.

by too infinity and beyond June 11, 2019

Uncle Napkin

When your niece is sitting next to you at McDonald's and she wipes the ketchup from her face onto your sleeve.

"I thought Alexandra was showing some affection for her good 'ol Uncle Mike but she just needed an Uncle Napkin."

by KingOfKensington February 5, 2010

Stress Napkin

A piece of paper, napkin or otherwise, used to absorb a load of jizz that a man produces when jerking off to relieve stress.

This has been a crappy day at work. I'm going to grab some stress napkins, go to the bathroom, and have some alone time.

by knightsofsesquipedalia March 17, 2015

Ham Napkin

A large, floppy labia, usually due to overuse or improper maintenance. Often found in pairs.

Carl: Honey Boo Boo's mom is enormous.

Rico: Yeah, I bet she's got a real nasty set of Ham Napkins.

Carl: I'd still do her. I think I have a problem.

by Gabe Lincoln March 23, 2013

Philadelphia Napkin

A dirty cum rag. Often used as a napkin on fancy occasions.

"Jesse, set the table for thanksgiving. Use the good Philadelphia napkins!"

by freudeschoener November 25, 2011

ass napkin

A napkin made from paper towels or sheets of toilet paper placed between your ass cheeks over your butt hole to decrease the chances of getting shit in your underwear.

I took a crap at work and couldn't wipe my ass very good so I placed an ass napkin inside the back of my underwear over my butt until I could get home later and wipe and clean properly.

by paulmor909 September 5, 2016

Pickle napkin

A napkin or cloth strategically placed on a plate or dish underneath pickles to block the flowing of juice from saturating another food.

I used a pickle napkin to stop the juice from flowing down the plate, getting my chip’s soggy.

by Chrissypoo9992 August 14, 2018