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puddle pirate

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Navy Sailor: thanks for staying home and watching the coasts, puddle pirate.

Coastie: Someone needs to keep those navy wives warm at night.
by theunknowngl October 16, 2004
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Puddle Pirate

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A small group of men and women conducting maritime, military and, multi-mission service unique among the U.S. military branches. They protect the Homeland with jurisdiction in both domestic and international waters. Envied by other military brances to included the U.S Navy "Squids".
Navy: Your just a stupid Puddle Pirate
Coastie: Hey shipmate someone's got to take care of the Homeland & Navy Wives, don't you know Navy wives make the best Coastie babies :)
by SirPaddy July 31, 2012
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a member of the coast guard who wants to be part of the navy but doesnt wanna work or leave home.
pussy in a navy recruiting office: i wanna join the navy but i dont wanna leave my boyfriend
Navy po: than go be a puddle pirate!
by navy pettyofficer October 5, 2009
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1)term used to describe USCG
Puddle Pirates are the cunt of the US armed forces
by L’âne May 22, 2019
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puddle pirate

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-one who jumps in and out of puddles shouting 'i'll find ye treasure matey!'

-a man who 'gets around' (male prostitute), and during his orgasm screams 'Arrrgghhh, thereeeee she blows!'; The puddles symbolize a woman's vagina, and the pirate represents the horny man.
Carly said she met this really nice Puddle Pirate down in the kittery, and he was free for the night. I bet she's going to have a wicked night.
by richie sims March 18, 2008
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Shut up you little puddle pirate
by F1nM4cl34n June 22, 2021
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One whom enjoys being pissed on by overweight women; similar to a pirate hunting a whale in the ocean, a puddle pirate is one who seeks out fat women for the free food she supplies and the overwhelming stench of her “squirt”.
Jeff is a puddle pirate, he loves getting owed on by fat bitches.
by thabiznass June 2, 2022
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