The most important prize
in the game of basketball, awarded to the player in a
particular game who nets the most Cape Points. Cape points reward manly
achievements such as blocked shots and offensive rebounding, and punish weak, pussy-ass, cowardly tendencies like passing and shooting three pointers.
Cape Points Formula:
PTS + 5*OFF REB + 3*DEF REB + 10*BLK - 10*3PA - 3*3PM -3*AST
Bonus points are awarded for Flagrant Fouls (+15) and Ejections (+25).
Dwight Howard typically leads the league in Cape Points.
Mike: "Yo man, did Dwight Howard keep The Cape tonight?"
Paul: "No, man. He was passing way too much and only finished with 73 Cape Points.
Chris Bosh really manned up. He had a bunch of
offensive rebounds and he finished with 95 Cape Points. Bosh is the new Capeholder."
Mike: "Nice, who won the game?"
Paul: "
Who the fuck cares?"