Skip to main content

there was an old lady who swallowed a fly

one of the darkest children's stories ever that ends every verse with the words "Perhaps She'll Die", with the exception of the very end where the old lady is finally dead
Guy 1: Did you hear how there was an old lady who swallowed a fly?
Guy 2: No what happened to her?
Guy 1: She died
Guy 2: Why did nobody help her?
Guy 1: She died after she ate the horse.
Guy 2: Wtf!

no fucking shit, lady! do i sound like i'm ordering a pizza? 

A quote from a movie called "die hard", meaning: obviously!
Usually used in phone conversations.
Supervisor: Attention, whoever you are. This channel is reserved for emergency calls only...
Detective John McClane: No fucking shit, lady! Do I sound like I'm ordering a pizza?

there was an old lady with skin patches who swallowed a horse 

A dark story for children that ends with the words "Perhaps She'll Die", with the exception of the very end where the old lady is finally dead.
Guy 1: Did you hear how there was an old lady with skin patches who swallowed a horse?

Guy 2: No what happened to her?

Guy 1: She died

Guy 2: Why did nobody help her?

Guy 1: She died after she ate the horse with patches and became deaf and her skin fell off

Guy 2: Wtf!

<.7.9.7.6.>I Have To Take Out THe thought Of The Accident That Resulted In a circle induced abrasion from New York states To Relay To all Of america, dumbass for m' dude fruitcake, m' lady fruitcakes<.7.9.7.6.> 

<.7.9.7.6.>I Have To Take Out THe thought Of The Accident That Resulted In a circle induced abrasion from New York states To Relay To all Of america, dumbass for m' dude fruitcake, m' lady fruitcakes<.7.9.7.6.>
<.7.9.7.6.>I Have To Take Out THe thought Of The Accident That Resulted In a circle induced abrasion from New York states To Relay To all Of america, dumbass for m' dude fruitcake, m' lady fruitcakes<.7.9.7.6.>

Lunch lady ass 

Ah ass that's extra tall and extra wide but not at all thicc
Also you don't kno where the legs stop and the ass start
"Damn that fat girl got lunch lady ass smh where her got damn legs even start tho"
Lunch lady ass by YaBoiSam October 18, 2016

First Lady Assassins 

Awesome band from Tulsa Oklahoma (T-Town)

First Lady Assassins formed in 2006 in a basement. Band members consist of...
Brian Bolton (Guitar), Brent Blackburn (Drums), Jordan Coon (Vocals), Jeremy Crouch (Guitar), & Jason Hamilton (Bass)
First Lady Assassins myspace URL (myspace.com/flaband)

Pills:
Uppers by day, downers by night.
i don't wanna go to work and i don't want to go to bed.
I don't need, fucking sleeep
I just need booze and speed.
Fuck you.


Less Punk Than you:
You listened back when LTJ was still ska
when punk was tuff not like the new Unwritten Law