A complete douchebag whose narcissism is unparalleled. To earn the title of twatwaffle, one must post selfies whenever they eat, drink, or take a dump. Additionally they must comment on every social and political issue that is trending for that day, usually hijacking someone else's thoughts. Twatwaffles are fueled by likes and comments on facebook and will go to any lengths to get them.
Did you see that twatwaffle's selfies today? Who takes that many pictures of themselves with a corn dog?
Recently added to the endangered species list; Envied and by all, A twatwaffle is a magical sentient being that flies around on rainbows; it is a friend of unicorns! Businesswomen like the inspiring nature of a twatwaffle, often referring to them as "a team player" and "a great asset." Morning wood is myth, men everywhere are having sudden, spontaneous erections after they've been exposed to a twatwaffle. If said erection lasts longer than four hour, consult your physician. When twatwaffles are not swirling around in the sky, you can often find them digging around in medical waste or pushing homeless people into their own shallow puddles of urine.
Businesswoman: "Is that a pencil sharpener in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?"
Man with erection: "Oh, no. I caught a glimpse of a rare twatwaffle yesterday!"