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the Crumps 

Unlike more common venereal diseases, 'the Crumps' is a sexually transmitted infection of such resiliance, David Hasselhoff is said to be heard singing in the ear of the afflicted as their genitals finally crumble. Thought to have originated in Yorkshire when a radioactive pubic louse bit an unsuspecting young rugby player on the cock. Symptoms include but are not limited to:
Thick, cloudy or bloody discharge from the penis or vagina
Metallic rings appearing on the genitals
Painful bowel movements
Severe adverse reaction to alcohol
Poor life choices
Listen, and understand. You've caught the Crumps. It can't be reasoned with. It doesn't feel pity, or remorse, or fear. And it absolutely will not stop, ever, until you are dead.

If you've been stabbed and then you get shot, the stabbing is nothing. It's the same with HIV and the Crumps.
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the cramps 

the cramps are still around and have been since 76!
the cramps by LL138 June 21, 2008

The Cramps 

R.I.P Lux (Erick Lee Purkhiser) Interior (October 21, 1946 – February 4, 2009) musician and a founding member of the legendary band The Cramps. He died at 4:30am on February 4, 2009, in Glendale, California of a pre-existing heart condition. The Cramps and Lux will be sadly missed.
I saw The Cramps at least 60 times and they were always kick ass.
The Cramps by Old Skool Jim February 5, 2009

Buttering the crumpet 

to ejaculate semen onto a partners anus
after gaining my brown wings, i enjoyed buttering the crumpet

eat the crumbs

To continue eating out a girl after she orgasms
When Alex made Jessica come he just kept eating. He was going to eat the crumbs.

the crumple zone 

The crumple zone is when the ass of the recipient is ample and the act of penetration from behind creates a ripple effect.
the crumple zone reminded Larry of waves on his vacation

The Crump 

When you have a spicy dump, perhaps after a bad curry and the ring is sore af afterwards and is res raw after which can be sore for days.
A Shrivelled red and sore butthole.

Originating from Newcastle UK
“Jack, you coming out to the pub lad?”

“Nahh alan, ive got the crump.”
The Crump by GeordieRepresent October 19, 2023