The Mortar 

when you have sex on an air mattress and right before you finish, you pop a huge hole into the mattress and cum into the air stream onto your partner's face so it arcs like a mortar.

I have to replace my air mattress because of The Mortar happening last night.

The Mortar by trufflemuffins23 November 1, 2019

The Mortar Strike: The Eternal Spanish Hit List: The First Juvenile Release... 

What I call homo-sapiens who are addicted to perianal abscesses.

Person 220: The Mortar Strike: The Eternal Spanish Hit List: The First Juvenile Release...

The Mortar Strike: The Eternal Spanish Hit List: The First Juvenile Release... by LeSouffleDeVersailles February 2, 2025

firing the mortar 

a hand motion that simulates masturbation.

to perform properly, start with your fist cupped as if ready to masturbate away from you body, bring your hand down to your crotch as if it were a mortar round being dropped in a mortar tube and then open your hand and return very quickly to the starting position. this simulates the mortar round exiting the tube and it looks very much like a wad of jizz being ejaculated from a male one eyed monster.

im gonna go fire my mortar{followed by the hand motion}.

im firing the mortar on the hooker's face {hand motion}

i just fired my mortar all over that hooker's face {do the hand motion}

anytime i get nervous my mortar fires prematurely {hand motion}

firing the mortar by ihtfpfmlmfwp January 27, 2009

Mortar in the chamber 

The impending need to make #2

I'll come over, but I have a mortar in the chamber so I need to take care of that first.

Mortar in the chamber by ASilentJ February 1, 2012

The Mortal Instruments 

An absolutely awesome series written by Cassandra Clare. It has everything! (demon fighting, canon slash, technical incest, faeries, werewolves, geeky references, etc.) The Fandom is one of the most perverted ones. We have great fanart. And a duck!

Person A:Have you read City of Bones yet?
Person B: No, I've never heard of it!
Person A: It's the first book in the Mortal Instruments series. I think you would like it!

The Mortal Instruments by thepacificislander June 15, 2012

The Mortal Instruments 

A series of fantasy books written by Cassandra Clare.

The books are about a species called Shadowhunters who can't be seen by ordinary mundanes (humans) and destroy demons and rogue Downworlders. Downworlders are werewolves, vampires, faeries, warlocks, etc.

The main characters are Clary Fray, Jace Wayland and Simon Lewis.

Person 1: Have you got the new The Mortal Instruments book?
Person 2: Yeah, it's awesome!

The Mortal Instruments by FlushedToilet May 15, 2011

the mortal kombat 

Besides being a kick ass fighting game mortal kombat also refers to a state of intoxication.

After a long night of drinking your head droops down and starts to bobble around. Much like in mortal kombat moments before the game says FINISH HIM. In which the person falls over and passes out.

Joe: Yo check at Rich lol, he's got the mortal kombat going. Should we finish him?

Kev: DAM RIGHT

ANNOUNCER: FINISH HIM
Rich finishes one more shot hits the ground and passes out.

the mortal kombat by BECKDADDY62 February 12, 2010