14 definitions by turdmeister
A titslap.
To be smeared by a pap.
To be beaten about the head by a large set of mammaries.
A near-lethal blow to the cranium, applied by one or more tits. Has the effect of changing one's facial expression very abruptly.
Can be used by females and Gibbses as a playful means of flirtation or foreplay with stout-hearted partners, or as a means of self defense in times of distress.
To be smeared by a pap.
To be beaten about the head by a large set of mammaries.
A near-lethal blow to the cranium, applied by one or more tits. Has the effect of changing one's facial expression very abruptly.
Can be used by females and Gibbses as a playful means of flirtation or foreplay with stout-hearted partners, or as a means of self defense in times of distress.
"Back off or I'll papsmear you!"
"She gave me such a papsmear, I'll have a tit imprint on my forehead for a week."
"She gave me such a papsmear, I'll have a tit imprint on my forehead for a week."
by turdmeister July 13, 2009
A turdometer is an instrument used for accurately measuring the exact physical properties of a turd. The turdometer can measure length, diameter, circumference, mass and density.
Turdometers are used extensively by turdologists
Turdometers are used extensively by turdologists
The turdologist measured the turd witth his turdometer to detarmine its exact turdometric properties.
by turdmeister June 25, 2010
A three point turd is a particularly nasty form of turd that occurs subsequent to the consumption of many samoosas.
It burns like hell and feels like it has three sharp corners.
Three point turds are commonly done by Indians, Malays, Hindus and other eastern denominations which are all commonly fond of samoosas, and are all known by one or more of the terms: Curries, Tjarras, Koelies, towel-heads and diaper-tops.
It burns like hell and feels like it has three sharp corners.
Three point turds are commonly done by Indians, Malays, Hindus and other eastern denominations which are all commonly fond of samoosas, and are all known by one or more of the terms: Curries, Tjarras, Koelies, towel-heads and diaper-tops.
"Goodgollyman, dat samoosa waz verry hot! I hev just dun a three point turd in muy undarodz!"
"Don't make your problems my problems, towel-head."
"Don't make your problems my problems, towel-head."
by turdmeister August 5, 2009
South African slang. An expression of dissaproval, dissapointment, or displeasure.
The opposite of befoklik
The opposite of befoklik
by turdmeister August 18, 2009
noun, plural shartes blanches shahrts blanch, blahnch; Fr. shart blahnsh
1. Unconditional authority; full discretionary power to shart as you please. Usually granted after a heavy night of drinking, or the accidental consumption of high volumes of laxitives.
2. A pair of jocks that is blank except for a shart and given by the shartist to another person to wear as he or she pleases.
3. Cards. a hand having no face card but with a really shitty scoring value, as in piquet.
1. Unconditional authority; full discretionary power to shart as you please. Usually granted after a heavy night of drinking, or the accidental consumption of high volumes of laxitives.
2. A pair of jocks that is blank except for a shart and given by the shartist to another person to wear as he or she pleases.
3. Cards. a hand having no face card but with a really shitty scoring value, as in piquet.
by turdmeister July 14, 2009
a) halfway between a shit and a fart.
b) a wet fart
c) a fart that smells so bad it could actually be a shit.
b) a wet fart
c) a fart that smells so bad it could actually be a shit.
by turdmeister July 13, 2009
The scientific study of turds. Although not traditionally recognized as a legitimate field of scientific research, Turdology has recently made some breakthroughs that have revolutionized the field. This recent progress is largely the result of the work of a group of Australian Turdologists who have for many years conducted extensive research sheep and other farmyard animals.
Turdologists employ the use of cutting edge technology and are admired by scientists in other fields of research for the many high-tech gizmo's that they use. Among these are the turdometer, for presisely measuring the physical dimensions of various turds, the turdiloscope, used for locating turds at the source, the turdmograph, for acurately plotting graphical representations of the data extracted from tests on many different turds, and the turdulatory analytical osmosifier, for analyzing the chemical composition of turds.
Turdologists employ the use of cutting edge technology and are admired by scientists in other fields of research for the many high-tech gizmo's that they use. Among these are the turdometer, for presisely measuring the physical dimensions of various turds, the turdiloscope, used for locating turds at the source, the turdmograph, for acurately plotting graphical representations of the data extracted from tests on many different turds, and the turdulatory analytical osmosifier, for analyzing the chemical composition of turds.
Turdology is for turdologists with turdiloscopes.
by turdmeister May 31, 2010