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turdmeister's definitions

shartoloading

Shartoloading is the practice of consuming vast quantities of laxatives to aid sharting. It is commonly practised among professional shartists and competitors in martial sharts events.
"I have to shartoload for tomorrows martial sharts competition"

"Wow, that was a good shart!! Have you been shartoloading?"
by turdmeister July 14, 2009
mugGet the shartoloadingmug.

befoklik

South african slang. A term of endearment, emphasizing intense approval of a situation.

Synonyms:
Awesome; cool; radical; kiff; lekker; nice; great; jolly good show what

Antonyms:
M.D.E; onbefoklik
"We're going to goofs for grub tonight."
"Befoklik!"
by turdmeister August 17, 2009
mugGet the befoklikmug.

three point turd

A three point turd is a particularly nasty form of turd that occurs subsequent to the consumption of many samoosas.
It burns like hell and feels like it has three sharp corners.

Three point turds are commonly done by Indians, Malays, Hindus and other eastern denominations which are all commonly fond of samoosas, and are all known by one or more of the terms: Curries, Tjarras, Koelies, towel-heads and diaper-tops.
"Goodgollyman, dat samoosa waz verry hot! I hev just dun a three point turd in muy undarodz!"
"Don't make your problems my problems, towel-head."
by turdmeister August 5, 2009
mugGet the three point turdmug.

turdometer

A turdometer is an instrument used for accurately measuring the exact physical properties of a turd. The turdometer can measure length, diameter, circumference, mass and density.
Turdometers are used extensively by turdologists
The turdologist measured the turd witth his turdometer to detarmine its exact turdometric properties.
by turdmeister June 28, 2010
mugGet the turdometermug.

onbefoklik

South African slang. An expression of dissaproval, dissapointment, or displeasure.
The opposite of befoklik
"Can you believe that man, he de-burrs his offcuts?"
"Onbefoklik!"
by turdmeister August 17, 2009
mugGet the onbefoklikmug.

turdologist

A turdologist is one who studies turdology.
I am a turdologist. I study turdology.
by turdmeister June 28, 2010
mugGet the turdologistmug.

Hardening of the sharteries

When the scene of a shart is left unattended over an extended period of time the sharticles, or particles of shart begin to harden due atmospheric exposure.

This results in the shart forming a thin crusty lining in the jocks which although uncomfortable, is sometimes preferable to admitting to having performed the initial shart in the first place.
"I knew I should have changed after that shart. Now I've got hardening of the sharteries."

"Madeline is walking a bit gingerly today, maybe she's got hardening of the sharteries..."
by turdmeister July 13, 2009
mugGet the Hardening of the sharteriesmug.

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