the colonel's definitions

Defcon

Stands for "defecation condition" - a play off of the government acronym for "defense condition". Refers to the varying, and usually scaling, levels of severity relating to an impending bowel movement. The direction of the sliding scale varies from user to user, but typical usage labels Defcon 1 as the least urgent, and Defcon 5 as an imminent expulsion (the opposite of the defense department's usage).

Dude, I was at Defcon 5 and nearly shit my pants. Luckily we drove by a Carl's Jr. and I was able to drop a load.

by The Colonel July 18, 2003

warbly

Uneven ripples on waves (similar to a boat wake) typically caused by angled backwash during an ebbing tide. These ripples warp the wave and create an unsteady, wobbly ride (warp + wobbbly = warbly).

Dude, that wave was so warbly that I wiped out.

by The Colonel July 18, 2003

bats in the cave

Bits of cocaine stuck to one's nose hairs.

Dude, I gotta check the mirror for bats in the cave before we go to the club.

by The Colonel July 18, 2003