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rtv0587's definitions

socialist

Anyone who disagrees with a Republican.
Are you a conservative?
No.
*gasp* Go back to France, you anti-American commie socialist traitor!!!
by rtv0587 May 1, 2011
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Crack

Do you have any crack, dude?

No, just Mr. Pibb

You suck
by rtv0587 July 6, 2009
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scarlet woman

A PC term for "slut" that Molly Weasley uses
I told you not to annoy her, Hermione! She's made you out to be some sort of...scarlet woman!
by rtv0587 December 3, 2010
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Let's just be friends

When a girl says this, it's code for:

1. "I want someone else"
2. "Why should I settle for some gay loser like you who will treat me like a princess when I could have a guy who will treat me like shit, cheat on me after getting me pregnant, and introduce me to all his friends as his personal sperm dumpster?"
3. Both of the above
Nice guy: I love you
Girl: Let's just be friends. I think you're probably gay anyway.

Jerkass guy: Hey bitch, want to let me snort cocaine off your ass after I have a three-way with you and your sister?
Girl: OH BABY, MARRY ME!!!
by rtv0587 June 22, 2012
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Michael Cera

A young actor who plays the exact same character in every single movie he's in - the awkward, perpetually virginal pussy. Will ultimately star in a remake of "The 40 Year Old Virgin" 20 years from now.
Michael Cera reading his script for the next movie he's in"

"I can't talk to girls. The last time I felt a breast was in a bucket of KFC. Every time a girl looks at me, I shit myself. I came in my pants just from watching The Little Mermaid."

Director: "That part is so you."
by rtv0587 June 14, 2011
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friend zone

The worst place in the world to be, and a place where every decent guy will find himself eventually. If you're a nice guy, as far as most girls are concerned you might as well be a gay guy, because both are considered undatable and un-fuckable.
Girl: You're such a great guy. Every time I got drunk and slept with my violent and abusive ex, you were always there for me.

Guy: Yea, I get it, I'm in the friend zone.

Girl 2: I just want to be friends. I'm not looking for a relationship now.

Guy 2: Translation: you want someone else.

Girl 2: Correct.
by rtv0587 June 22, 2012
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