2 definitions by nottheownerofelka

a really bad wingman. A wingman lacking the ability to "fly" and help out his fellow friends.

The ultimate tag of shame that can be place on any human being.
Guy 1: That girl is really hot! Plus, she is smart, funny and everything else in between. I would like to get to know her better.

Ryan: I'll help you out! I'll do whatever I can to make things work between you two.

Guy 1: Thanks Ryan. You are such a great friend. I just invited her to hang out with me tonight.

Ryan: Great. Well I'm going to invite her to do something completely different, and see if she chooses hanging out with you or me.

Guy 1: What the fuck! You are a goddamn penguin.
by nottheownerofelka July 4, 2011
The act of boiling pounds of Greek yogurt and pouring it on your first born child.
"Julie, your baby is soooo cute! I hope he survives hot yoga next Wednesday!"
by nottheownerofelka June 12, 2015