Definitions by neil baxter

bacon brigade

The Police, modified from the popular term for police, 'pigs'.

The cause of much hilarity, the police have been comedy targets throughout the world for years...

"How many police officers does it take to break an egg?"
"None... the egg fell down the stairs of it's own accord!"

"I always wanted to be a policeman, but I failed the criteria... my mother and father are married."

"Oink Oink... do you smell bacon?"

"What do you mean... oh yes... here come the bacon brigade! Oy streaky!"

bacon brigade by Neil Baxter October 4, 2005

Chicken Tarka

Indian Curried Dish and terrible pun.

"Would you like a Chicken Tarka sir... it's like a Chicken Tikka only a little Otter!"

Chicken Tarka by Neil Baxter October 4, 2005

pussdog 

One of those cute wee doggies that has whiskers and would equally double as a cat if necessary.

"aaw. Now then puss? Who's an ickle-wickle pussdog then?"

pussdog by Neil Baxter October 4, 2005

trimsy 

1. That fringe of fur beneath the tale of a shaggy dog that often needs the poop cutting off of it.

2. To remove said fur with scissors in order to 'de-tag' the canine chum thus making him/her more presentable and less stinky.

"I think that that bumsy needs a trimsy... where's them scissors?"

trimsy by Neil Baxter October 4, 2005

Poose 

POOSE (n.) "Pewse"

Colloquial Scots term for 'cat'.

"Cam tey grips, ye wee raj - yer poose has shat ayl awaer ma livin' rhume!"

From "McCatSpotting" by Irwin Scots.

Poose by Neil Baxter September 29, 2005

chegwin

CHEGWIN (verb). JEGG-WJINN.

To secrete alchohol outside one's home to be consumed away from friends and relatives in secret... often whilst walking the dog or 'going for some fresh air'.

"Casper? Thy's not getten a Kestrel at all - your Judd's told me - yer Mam caught yer ovver t' wreck wi' some Diamond White... we all know's you Chegwin!"

(From "Kes... t' Director's Cut")

chegwin by Neil Baxter September 29, 2005

dimmocks 

Dimmocks: 'dim-mucks' n.

1. Slack-breasts usually sported by older women with ginger hair who want to be 'free and easy' i.e. they don't feel the need to wear a bra or a garment that will at least keep their 'chest mumps' above navel level.

2. People who quote 'Monty Python' sketches word for word... usually students who were born many years after the damned thing originally aired.

3. Plural term applied to anyone who watches 'Big Brother'.

"Good God woman... we don't want to see yer dimmocks - go and put a cardigan on or summat - yer making me granddad heave!"

dimmocks by Neil Baxter September 23, 2005