John (status update): Good morning world!
John (commenting on his own status): LML!
John (commenting on his own status again): God, I'm such a self-poster!
John (commenting on his own status): LML!
John (commenting on his own status again): God, I'm such a self-poster!
by nearly civilized November 17, 2011
Get the self-poster mug.A makeshift calendar kept in your head so there's no evidence; used to stalk someone you're obsessed with. It is compiled mainly from readily available information made public on social networking sites, and through eavesdropping, lurking, gossip, and rumor.
Jill: You know Brit's gonna be at the party next week, right?
Jack: Oh, for sure. Had that shit marked on my stalker calendar for weeks.
Jill: I have a crush on your friend John...
Jack: Want me to have him add you as a friend?
Jill: No, it's cool...I always know what he's doing. He RSVPs to events, says where he's at in his status, and we have enough mutual friends for me to start a decent stalker calendar.
Jill to Jane: Wanna meet at StarB's Tuesday?
Jane: Yeah, like 8:00?
Jack (lurking ten feet away) to self: Sweet!
Jill: Funny how we keep showing up at the same spots!
Jack: Isn't it?
Jack to self: Thank you, stalker calendar!
Jack: Oh, for sure. Had that shit marked on my stalker calendar for weeks.
Jill: I have a crush on your friend John...
Jack: Want me to have him add you as a friend?
Jill: No, it's cool...I always know what he's doing. He RSVPs to events, says where he's at in his status, and we have enough mutual friends for me to start a decent stalker calendar.
Jill to Jane: Wanna meet at StarB's Tuesday?
Jane: Yeah, like 8:00?
Jack (lurking ten feet away) to self: Sweet!
Jill: Funny how we keep showing up at the same spots!
Jack: Isn't it?
Jack to self: Thank you, stalker calendar!
by nearly civilized January 05, 2010
Get the stalker calendar mug.Thinking with your dick instead of your brain.
A slightly different take on Pink Floyd's 1987 album "A Momentary Lapse of Reason", used to describe the process in which the male anatomy overrides all rational decision making. Similarities can be drawn to "the heart wants what the heart wants", but "what the penis wants" is more powerful, visceral, and immediate.
A slightly different take on Pink Floyd's 1987 album "A Momentary Lapse of Reason", used to describe the process in which the male anatomy overrides all rational decision making. Similarities can be drawn to "the heart wants what the heart wants", but "what the penis wants" is more powerful, visceral, and immediate.
Jack: Dude, you must have been beer goggling last night. That girl was such a butterface!
Jim: Yeah, I had a momentary lapse of penis.
John: Why the hell did I out my crush like that and admit to having all these feelings...I don't even like her that much!
Jake: Blame it on a momentary lapse of penis!
Jim: Yeah, I had a momentary lapse of penis.
John: Why the hell did I out my crush like that and admit to having all these feelings...I don't even like her that much!
Jake: Blame it on a momentary lapse of penis!
by nearly civilized February 18, 2010
Get the A Momentary Lapse of Penis mug.A devastating social disorder where a person wants to achieve celebrity without any work. Symptoms present themselves in: the desire to be famous (or becoming famous) for doing absolutely nothing, entitlement issues, excessive Twitter activity; amassing an army of facebook friends for no particular purpose (i.e. showingcasing one's art, reel, portfolio, etc.) other than to garner attention. The sufferer is often deluded by the idea that one can be "made" a celebrity if enough people follow or friend them. Other signs of the disorder can include creating and/or "leaking" your own sex tape, public photos without underwear, inability to form or maintain genuine relationships, the title of "socialite", and rich parents who might have actually accomplished something in their lifetime.
Dr. Kibblesauce: Celebritism is becoming rampant among today's youth...a crippling disorder my research shows to have originated with Paris Hilton and mutated in Kim Kardashian. It is also closely associated with Los Angelism.
John (on Twitter): Yay! I'm up to 3442 friends on facebook!
Jane: Dude, you gotta tone down the celebritism...you only know 42 of them!
Meg (tweeting about her dog): Apparently Cherie's surgery went really well. (Thank goodness!!) She's in recovery now. #getwellsooncherie
Guy: Who the fu©k cares?? God, I wanna smack that bitch then go eat a cheeseburger.
John (on Twitter): Yay! I'm up to 3442 friends on facebook!
Jane: Dude, you gotta tone down the celebritism...you only know 42 of them!
Meg (tweeting about her dog): Apparently Cherie's surgery went really well. (Thank goodness!!) She's in recovery now. #getwellsooncherie
Guy: Who the fu©k cares?? God, I wanna smack that bitch then go eat a cheeseburger.
by nearly civilized February 21, 2011
Get the Celebritism mug.John: I was shopping online, hit an ad for HP toner, bought some and when it arrived, there were ads for Directv inside the box! That's some serious adception.
Jane: Well, I started seeing posters for it on buses and watched the trailer...when I actually saw the movie, there were ads before the previews and product placement throughout the whole thing. Excessive adception me want to walk out!
Jane: Well, I started seeing posters for it on buses and watched the trailer...when I actually saw the movie, there were ads before the previews and product placement throughout the whole thing. Excessive adception me want to walk out!
by nearly civilized November 06, 2011
Get the Adception mug.