3 definitions by fungusfollower69

The unofficial and Zoomer version of cap means “lies” or “false statement(s)” Capathon is when someone keeps on saying lies. Like a lying marathon, hence the name, Capathon.
Person 1: You’re so pretty!

Person 2: Uh, thanks.

Person 1: Yeah and smart too!
Person 2: Capathon.
by fungusfollower69 December 24, 2019
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The Christmas Rules sound like they would be a seasonal thing, but no, don't be fooled. The Christmas Rules are to be followed throughout the entire year if one would like to reach peak wisdom and enlightenment. Follow the Christmas Rules, and you will live a fulfilling life full of divine knowledge. The rules are as follows (and none can be taken lightly):

1. Celebrate.

2. Don't send soapy tiddy pics.

3. Don't be a simp. (fictional characters and celebrities such as Alex Turner are an exception)

4. FOLLOW THE GAMING FUNGUS. (the most important rule, if you follow the others rules and not this one, it doesn't count)

5. Become sped. (another form of saying speed, basically do everything as speedily as possible)
Person 1: "5 is my lucky number, that's why it's in my username."
Person 2: "Why 5?"

Person 1: "Well, I've followed all five of the Christmas rules for five years now and as a reward, and no, this is not a coincidence, I've found five dollars underneath my pillow every single morning. It just goes to show how following the Christmas Rules does nothing but make your life more divine. Join me, my bruddha, in my journey of following the Christmas Rules.
by fungusfollower69 June 21, 2021
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The VCSM, previously known as the Seggsy Squad, are the deadliest group of boys to exist. If you are a naive girl who thinks gamers are “cool” or “cute”, you are likely to be attracted to this group. However, don’t be mistaken. At first glance, their headsets and “fluffy hair” may be tempting, but they aren’t the good kind of gamer boys at all. In reality, they are a cult of 4 boys who cause nothing but pain and agony to innocent girls willing to love them. If you see any of these creatures, run for your life.

V - Vicious Vegetable. Looks like a vegetable, acts very vicious. Does not know how to be in a relationship. Emotionally unavailable. Has a very nasally, woman-like voice. Previously simped for by Z.

C - Creator Of Cringe Cone (COCC). The root of all cringe in the universe. Significantly large forehead. Has more voice cracks than you would think possible. Drier than the Sahara desert. Has no idea how to handle emotions of any shape or form. Previously simped for by A.
S - Stoner Skeleton. He is a literal skeleton. No muscle, just bones. Will only speak to you once every millennia. Just ugly. I and Z previously simped at different times.

M - Malicious Misleading Musty Mistake. Looks like a horse/sausage. Insane commitment issues. Doesn't know how to feel properly. Either sounds like a 60 year old man or a 2 year old girl. VERY into 2d girls. Previously simped for A and I.

What do they have in common? They’ve all played CSGO.

not to be confused with: bdsm
Uninformed, naive person - “Who’s that hot group of boys over there? I really want to ask one of them out.”

Well-informed, wise person - “That, my friend, is the VCSM. You know that “hotness” you speak of? It’s actually mustiness in disguise. Those are men that will pick video games over you any day, and probably are incapable of loving anyone that isn’t a twitch streamer or anime girl. Stay safe out there.”
by fungusfollower69 June 28, 2021
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