10 definitions by dirkdiggler9969

To get drunk. Furthermore, the amount of drunk you presently are can be represented by how much your cap is twisted. This is done by starting in the natural position and slowing rotating your hat clockwise to the degree of intoxication.
"Yo, I got my cap twisted last night!"

"Look at Rob, his cap is almost fully twisted."
by dirkdiggler9969 April 25, 2009
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The lights that unfortunately come on at the end of the night at the club. This usually alerts the victim that he has spent the last 2 hours talking to a chick that is gross. This surprises the victim who was under the impression that he/she was talking to an attractive girl/guy until the lights came on and made him say... whoa this bitch/dude is ugly. Hence "whoa lights"
Nick: Yo Rob, did you bang that chick I saw you talking to at the club last night?

Rob: Hell no! The whoa lights came on and I realized she had a God Damn wart on her cheek.
by dirkdiggler9969 April 24, 2009
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When someone talks too damn much and needs a conversation timeonut, that person has been put on conversation probation.
Rob: "Shut the fuck up!"
Nick: "What?"
Rob: "Bitch, your on conversation probation for 20 minutes!"
by dirkdiggler9969 April 25, 2009
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noun/adj

An imaginary character that is the coolest guy that has ever lived. His status is sought by many and obtained by none.
Someone who is acting like thier shit don't stink. These people can usually be spotted with sunglasses on in the club.
"Look at that douchebag over there trying to look like he's JJ Smoof or somebody."

or

"Nick was wearing his glasses in the club the other night like he was JJ Smoof"

or

"Rob took his shirt off 2 blocks from the beach on Saturday. He was JJ Smoofin'.
by dirkdiggler9969 May 27, 2009
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When one becomes sick with a "I don't give a fuck attitude." This usually occurs after someone has been tried one too many times or has become extremely intoxicated. This syndrome usually begins in the left calf and quickly spreads throughout the body. This term was invented in Florida during the Master P era. Master P was always talking about his soldiers and when the question arrose after a long night of drinking "How does one become a soldier." Getting infected with soldieritis of course!
by dirkdiggler9969 April 24, 2009
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Having sexual relations with a female and her friend is always acceptable as long as the total score of said bitches hotness equals 10 or more.
The 3some plus rule

While having sex with a 9, one only needs to include a 2 or greater to make said intercourse awesome and braggable.

Coversely, having sex with a 5 and a 4 is just average and the particapator should be ridiculed for banging 2 Gremlins.

In extreme situations the hotness scale can be ignored for certain features such as huge tits or no gag reflex. Of course these attributes must be reviewed by a panel of your peers.
by dirkdiggler9969 May 4, 2009
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A girl that seems very attractive and cute until the "brightlights" come on at the club and you realize that she is a horrible disfigured monster.
I was talking to this bitch at the club and then the whoa lights came on and that bitch was a Gremlin.
by dirkdiggler9969 April 24, 2009
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