Twilight

A popular book about True Love and 'vegetarian'Vampires by Stephanie Meyer. It is commonly agreed as lacking any literary skill, from prose to characters to plot. This does not stop girls the world over (and according to statistics that may be lies, a lesser amount of boys) from liking it.

Like all popular things the loudest fans are the most annoying ones (in this case girls demanding the world over recognize Edward Cullen as hotness) and sadly make the rest of the fans who'd like to just enjoy a bad book (much like people enjoy Jerry Springer) look like raving psychos by association.

Twilight managed to fill the void of Harry Potter for a short amount of time (much to the anger of Harry Potter fans and as so says the literary bible, 'lo, there was much bitching'). Now the literary world is left wondering what next will catch the eye of teens the world over and become so popular that even those who like to claim illiteracy to get out of responsiblity towards school, spelling or grammar will read it on the sly when no one's looking.

Studies have been made investigating the idea of Twilight as a parable of Mormon faith (the religion of the author). Stephanie Meyers claims this is not so, but studies find otherwise. If you're wondering why Edward is a cocktease to Bella, it is because he's secretly Mormon--ignore the fact he's connected to Vampires who live in the Vatican. The fact those Vampires are the Evil Vampires may or may not be an attack on Christianity. Meyers says this is not so.

She also says there were not enough sparkles on the Vampires in the 2008 movie of the first novel.
Consumer: Do you have Twilight by Stephanie Meyers? I hear it is a read of many lols.

Book Store Clerk: I'm afraid due to the publishers being on crack they didn't think there'd be a holiday rush--I can offer it to you in Spanish?

Consumer: I am enraged over this. My teenage daughter needs this Twilight book for Christmas. You've done this just to spite me; I will never shop at this store again.
by daltypalty December 12, 2008
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