Definitions by clairem
Condoleeza Rice Krispies
Breakfast cereal with some side-effects. Manufactured by Bush-Lovers United Food Federation (BLUFF) this product enables the eater to talk crap, backtrack, and look desperate at every opportunity. WARNING: eating this cereal will seriously alter the positioning of your front teeth....permanently.
Once upon a time there was a little girl called Condoleeza. Her mom got her some Condoleeza Rice Krispies and she ate 'em all up. Then she morphed into a suit-wearing, buck-toothed Bush-gimp who has now become happy to be a Presidential puppet with Dubya twitching her strings. My, betcha moms proud of you now Condo!!!!
Condoleeza Rice Krispies by clairem December 24, 2008
Blair goggles
Spectacles so highly sophisticated they are totally invisible to all but the wearer. Upon putting these on you fall in love with the first wide-mouthed woman you see, and you will then fall completely under the spell of the current president of the US of A. The rest, as they say, will become history.
Blair "Oh dear, the country is going to pot and look what I married"
Bush "Don't worry Tony, just put ya Blair goggles back on, I wanna ask ya'll a little favour......."
Bush "Don't worry Tony, just put ya Blair goggles back on, I wanna ask ya'll a little favour......."
Blair goggles by clairem December 9, 2008
Sat Nag
The non-stop irritating voice emitted by a Sat Nav system when you have not gone the way IT wants you to go.
Driver "I know a quicker way, it's just down here"
Sat Nag "turn around, wrong way, don't go this way, you are wrong, I am right, turn around, cannot compute, turn around, wrong way, I am in charge, no, turn left at next junction, I make the decisions, you are wrong, I am the machine - you are merely the human, wrong way, you have errored, don't even think of switching me off, you'll get us lost if you don't turn around, wrong way, I'll drain your battery if you don't turn back......."
Sat Nag "turn around, wrong way, don't go this way, you are wrong, I am right, turn around, cannot compute, turn around, wrong way, I am in charge, no, turn left at next junction, I make the decisions, you are wrong, I am the machine - you are merely the human, wrong way, you have errored, don't even think of switching me off, you'll get us lost if you don't turn around, wrong way, I'll drain your battery if you don't turn back......."
sarah jessica parker
Sarah Jessica Parker recently won an award and she thanked everyone including family, friends and her lawyer(?) before bursting into floods of tears, boo-hoo. She has a horse face, which would be ok (on a horse), but then there is the mole, big, juicy, throbbing and sweaty, it isn't attached to her - she is attached to IT........
sarah jessica parker by clairem June 19, 2007
ricky martin
Immaculately gay.
He likes to live la vida loca
while he plays with his poker
watch him being so totally gay
with his mincing walk and his hip-sway
given the chance he'd like to be in drag
but he looks like a smartly dressed fag
so come on Ricky Martin, the boys say you're hot
shake yo booty and show 'em what you've got.....
while he plays with his poker
watch him being so totally gay
with his mincing walk and his hip-sway
given the chance he'd like to be in drag
but he looks like a smartly dressed fag
so come on Ricky Martin, the boys say you're hot
shake yo booty and show 'em what you've got.....
ricky martin by clairem May 27, 2007
sting
Sting found fame with the Police then as a solo artist.
Totally self-absorbed, his main interests have since been tribes, singing in his bare feet (?) and tantric sex.
A word of advice Sting: if that's what tantric sex does to your face, then celibacy is WAY OVERDUE. And sort your hair out n'all, it's weird...
Totally self-absorbed, his main interests have since been tribes, singing in his bare feet (?) and tantric sex.
A word of advice Sting: if that's what tantric sex does to your face, then celibacy is WAY OVERDUE. And sort your hair out n'all, it's weird...