carl j. maltese's definitions
Just another damned clone produced by Bell Labs under contract to Disney. When she is all-used-up, they'll produce more to unleash on the public.
"Hannah Montana. Proof you can come from nowhere and bring it with you. Also, few adults know or even care that her last name is spelled with only two "n's", not three."
by Carl J. Maltese February 16, 2008
Get the Hannah Montanamug. Unemployment Office Person: "Name and occupation?"
Comicus: "Comicus, Stand-up Philosopher."
Unemployment Office Person: "A what?"
Comicus: "A Stand-up Philosopher. I take the collasence of daily life and produce anectdotes that have synonymous meaning with various people."
Unemployment Office Person: "Oh. A bullshit artist!"
Comicus: "Uh...Yeah."
Unemployment Office Person: "Well, did you bullshit today? Did you try to bullshit today? Try harder or we'll have to cut-off you payments. Next please!"
Comicus: "Comicus, Stand-up Philosopher."
Unemployment Office Person: "A what?"
Comicus: "A Stand-up Philosopher. I take the collasence of daily life and produce anectdotes that have synonymous meaning with various people."
Unemployment Office Person: "Oh. A bullshit artist!"
Comicus: "Uh...Yeah."
Unemployment Office Person: "Well, did you bullshit today? Did you try to bullshit today? Try harder or we'll have to cut-off you payments. Next please!"
by Carl J. Maltese April 12, 2007
Get the Stand-up philosophermug. 1) A girl (or guy) who thinks they are a model, but in reality they are not. Usually they are just full-of-themselves, among other things!
2) A girl (or guy) who thinks they are a model, but really couldn't and shouldn't! They should take that money they were saving for Barbizon and go buy a mirror!
3) Any girl (or guy) who isn't pretty...they just look that way!!
2) A girl (or guy) who thinks they are a model, but really couldn't and shouldn't! They should take that money they were saving for Barbizon and go buy a mirror!
3) Any girl (or guy) who isn't pretty...they just look that way!!
"There was always that one girl we knew back in high school. The spoiled only-child type who practically smothered herself in makeup and nail polish and was too busy to so much as give you the time of day. She thought she was going to be a model, but in reality she was just another barbizombie, trapped in the endless night-of-the-living-depressed."
by Carl J. Maltese May 5, 2007
Get the barbizombiemug. Suposed homosexual porn movie about the life of Jesus Christ compared with a nameless contemporary man and their shared sexual tastes. Hotly sought-out and marked for destruction by the Religious Right, in reality there is NO SUCH MOVIE!!!
Rumours of such a movie have been circulating since the early 1970's. Said rumours were probably started amongst the Gay community for sole purpose of annoying the Moraly Indignant, and there was even a false review of it in a book about the "golden turkeys," aka the worst movies ever made. This, of course, only served to strengthing the Religious Right's resolve to find-and-burn!! It's review in said book of "golden turkeys" was actually part of a reader contest to find the one fake movie amongst the real "stinkers."
Despite endless (and fruitless) searches --and the truth being held in their collective faces-- certain members of the Religious Right still continue their sacred mission to find-and-destroy this non-existant movie!
Rumours of such a movie have been circulating since the early 1970's. Said rumours were probably started amongst the Gay community for sole purpose of annoying the Moraly Indignant, and there was even a false review of it in a book about the "golden turkeys," aka the worst movies ever made. This, of course, only served to strengthing the Religious Right's resolve to find-and-burn!! It's review in said book of "golden turkeys" was actually part of a reader contest to find the one fake movie amongst the real "stinkers."
Despite endless (and fruitless) searches --and the truth being held in their collective faces-- certain members of the Religious Right still continue their sacred mission to find-and-destroy this non-existant movie!
Bill: "Hey, man. You here about that gay-porn movie called "Him?" Some pretty freaky sheet happens in it!"
Tom: "Calm yourself down before you ruin your shorts. There is no such movie. It's all just a rumour going 'round."
Bill: "Really? Then what the hell was that video I was watching last night!?"
Tom: "You STILL have home video of my 16th birthday party!?"
Tom: "Calm yourself down before you ruin your shorts. There is no such movie. It's all just a rumour going 'round."
Bill: "Really? Then what the hell was that video I was watching last night!?"
Tom: "You STILL have home video of my 16th birthday party!?"
by Carl J. Maltese May 12, 2007
Get the Himmug. A nice job, if you can get it.
by Carl J. Maltese April 21, 2007
Get the blow jobmug. "Imatation" spelled backwards. Used as a seemingly harmless word to describe someone of either gender who is: an annoying braggart, a B.S. artist, an egotist, is shallow, fake, two faced, and/or self-centered, and/or all of the above. Usually said "person" is so-full-of-themselves that they never figure out what the word is or means!
"Ha! Listen to that Mikey talken' about single-handedly winning the football game! Like we didn't help. What a noitatami!!"
by Carl J. Maltese April 29, 2007
Get the noitatamimug. One of the three world superstates as described in George Orwell's "1984."
Oceania consists of North and South America, Austrailia, New Zealand, some of the Pacific islands, all the Atlantic islands--including the British Isles-- and South Africa. The British Isles are known as "Airstrip 1."
Oceania consists of North and South America, Austrailia, New Zealand, some of the Pacific islands, all the Atlantic islands--including the British Isles-- and South Africa. The British Isles are known as "Airstrip 1."
by Carl J. Maltese April 14, 2007
Get the Oceaniamug.